Jennifer Garner as <i>Miss Marple</i>? We Can Think of Worse

Disney has acquired the rights to Agatha Christie's meek-old-lady-solving-crimes property Miss Marple and plans to turn it into a feature film reboot starring... Jennifer Garner, who is only 38 and primarily known for kicking people while wearing lingerie on Alias. So they're going a different way with it! A younger, and hence, more attractive way with it, which sounds like a financially sound trend that could really take off. Might we suggest even worse old people recasting/reboot ideas? Yes. Yes we might.

Grumpy Old Men... starring Ashton Kutcher and Dax Shepard as lovable curmudgeons who just don't want to be bothered during their video games!

On Golden Pond... starring Keira Knightley and Channing Tatum as bickering WASPs on a boat!

Mama's Family... starring Miley Cyrus as a cantankerous matriarch with a feather duster!

Murder, She Wrote... starring Scarlett Johansson as the sexy Jessica Fletcher who sexily solves sex mysteries through her powers of deduction -- and her boobs!

Driving Miss Daisy... starring Evan Rachel Wood and Tyrese as a white woman and her illiterate black driver! (They're going to have to keep this a period piece, I think.)

Cocoon... starring Shia LaBeouf, Dan Fogler and Michael Cera as three mature gentlemen looking to finally regain their long lost youth!

The Bucket List... starring Miranda Cosgrove and Willow Smith in an epic tale of eating an entire thing of cookie dough and watching R-rated movies! Past 10 o'clock!

Something's Gotta Give... starring Amanda Seyfried and Alex Pettyfer as two over-the-hill lovebirds who overcome their ageism, stop dating middle schoolers and start drinking legally after their next birthdays!

Whatever Happened to Baby Jane... starring Vanessa Hudgens and Ashley Tisdale, squatting in Zac Efron's least frequented country home!

Space Cowboys... starring the cast of Jackass in ten gallon astronaut helmets!

Your bad ideas? Leave them in the comments!

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