Boring is the New Black

America's Next Top Model

Episode Report Card

Potes: B- | 33 USERS: C-

YOU GRADE IT

Boring is the New Black

By Potes | Season 20 | Episode 14 | Aired on 11.15.2013

In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

We begin with the elimination of one of our three finalists, which is a sad time for everyone since it's Cory who gets the ax. He feels hopeless and completely despondent, but at least he doesn't have to pretend to be a dude-man anymore. We learn that Tyra put the models through this traumatic experience because once she got canned from a Versace show in Paris after she'd already had her hair and makeup done. Please don't tell me this has something to do with Naomi Campbell being mean to her. Get OVER it, woman!

The runway show takes place in the "Beautiful Garden of Good Fortune," and people with fire are involved. Last season's winner Laura James is on hand to give Marvin and Jourdan the unique and profound advice to be fierce and smize. Tyra talks about how she learned that the culture in Bali revolves around good versus evil (e.g., Tyra versus Naomi, which is what everything in Tyra's brain revolves around) and also chanting. And this is where the laugh riot of a video that the models filmed last week comes in. In this video, which I guess is there to raise awareness of domestic abuse issues (???????), there is a lot of Jourdan running with her hair bouncing in the wind. She leaves her happy relationship with angelic Marvin and then gets discovered as a model, lusting after fellow evildoer model Cory. Angelic Marvin has a sad in response. But then one year later, Jourdan catches Cory making out with Laura. She also has a bruise on her temple, which I find quite odd. Lucky for her, angelic Marvin has not moved on yet, and just stands there gazing lovingly from his angelic halo haze.

Finally we get to the runway show, and Marvin, Jourdan and Cory are roughly in character. Some poor Top Model PAs had to make signs with glitter paint that correspond to the finalists' signature colors. Who knew you could find a Michaels in Bali? We see other eliminated models walk, too, and are left to wonder why Jiana didn't win this whole thing. Kelly and Tyra totally heckle and scream at all the contestants. Mike deserves it, since he still walks like he's wearing a poopy diaper. Jourdan stumbles a little when her heel gets caught in her dress, but overall is just fine. Triumph of the spirit and all that. Jourdan, Marvin and Cory then continue their drama on the runway, where Jourdan pushes Cory down and takes photos of him for some odd reason. She then kisses Marvin straight on the lips, which comes as a surprise to him. And then everyone walks down the runway with that "20" hand symbol, and also boo domestic violence, I guess.

After Marvin and Jourdan have one final photo shoot with Tyra, they go before the judges. The judges deliberate for a while about whether Jourdan's innate dullness matters or not, and apparently they decide that boring is cool. Jourdan wins, handily. Marvin cries but is bumblingly dignified about it, and Chris and Mike are each handed $1,000 for their catwalk crew service to the winner.

Want more? The full recap starts right below!

The end is nigh! Yes, the 20th cycle of America's Next Top Model is coming to a close, and dudes have been involved this time. There is a fiery runway coming up, and Tyra asks who we're rooting for to win some of the biggest prizes in the show's history. Will it be Marvin, the Latin Bronx flirt with chiseled cheekbones and an expired condom who has found his stride in photos and romance with Renee? Or is it Jourdan, the insecure country cutie whose passion for modeling has made her unstoppable and an annoyance to everyone lo these last weeks? Or perhaps Cory, a hero for our time who is determined to show the world that androgyny is beautiful? Yes, it's Cory! Of course it's Cory. And you put him in this final three just to play with our emotions, didn't you Tyra?

If you'll recall, last week the judges held an impromptu elimination right before the final three were set to take the runway. Their rankings were based solely on the Guess photos, and there were positive and negative comments about each. Tyra tells our final three that the judges have already scored the photos, as has social media. The results are in. Cory already looks defeated, before Tyra says that she only has two photos in her hands. And you know what those two photos represent. The first model who's still in the running is…Jourdan. She got an 8 from Kelly and 9's from Tyra and Rob, along with a fan vote of 6. That’s 32 points total. And then we see the respective scores for Marvin and Cory. Marvin got a 7 from Kelly and 8's from Rob and Tyra, along with a fan vote of 4.5. That's 27.5 points overall. And dear, sweet, lovable Cory got a 10 from Tyra, 7 from Rob, and a freaking FIVE from Kelly, along with a fan vote of 4.6. That's 26.6 points, which means that he's been eliminated. Marvin's catwalk crew is obviously happy for him, though Marvin acts appropriately somber as he gives Cory an awkward hug.

A tearful Cory interviews that he feels hopeless, and that there's nothing he can do except model his ass off. Tyra hugs Cory, and tells him that even coming this far is still huge for him. Then she goes, "LGBT, holla holla holla! Hero." What is she even TALKING about? Cory is happy that he gets to be himself out on the runway and not have to take on the role of a dude-man. And he's also happy that he showed people that you can be a queen AND be on America's Next Top Model. I didn't realize that was a barrier that had to be overcome in the post-Jays era, but okay. Tyra tells Cory that he will still be walking in the fashion show, before going on to regale the models with the story about how once when she was about to walk the runway for Versace in Paris, she was cancelled (already in full hair and makeup) 15 minutes before the show was to begin. Yes, Tyra eliminated Cory in this horrible way just so she could once again let us know that Naomi Campbell was mean to her. We got it! Anyway, resilience, blah blah blah.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 Next