Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Bewitched, Bothered And Bewildered

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B+ | 7 USERS: B+
YOU GRADE IT
Got The Love

In the library, Buffy asks Giles if he's okay. Aw. He says he will be, and that he's more concerned about her, informing her that Angelus is prone to "brutal displays" around Valentine's Day that masquerade as affection. That doesn't sound very different from many of my girlfriends' boyfriends, I must say. Buffy asks for an example, which Giles is reluctant to give her, and suggests that she stay off the streets for a few nights. "Better safe than sorry." Buffy: "It's a little late for both." Isn't this episode supposed to be, like, fun?

A hand opens a large jewelry box to reveal an ornate gold necklace. Spike asks, "Fancy it, pet?" Dru goes into one of those semi-orgasmic simpers to convey that she is indeed taken with it, and Spike starts to say that she gets nothing but the best when he's interrupted by a hand dropping a fresh heart onto the table in front of Dru. Angelus, wearing more makeup than Ziggy Stardust, wishes her a happy Valentine's, and Dru bleats that the heart is still warm. Angelus, mischievously staring at Spike, says he found it "in a quaint little shop girl." Hee. With the Rocky Horror makeup and the unblinking gaze at Spike, Angelus is coming off as pretty darned bisexual here, which I suppose is no surprise if you've ever visited the Angel forums. He notices the necklace, and puts it around Dru's neck before Spike can object. He smirks that although Dru gives Spike "pity access," making me wonder just how flexible she is, it's easier if he himself steps in and does things for her. Spike icily replies that he should worry about the Slayer. Angelus muses that he's trying to settle on the best way to send his "regards," and Spike suggests he rip her lungs out. Angelus: "Lacks poetry." Spike: "Doesn't have to. What rhymes with 'lungs'?" Let's see:

Oh, Buffy, I'll climb your heart's rungs
To get to the spot where I can rip out your lungs.

Well, if my little attempt is any indication, I'd say the answer to Spike's question is, "Not much." Dru laughs and tells Spike that Angelus always knows what speaks to a girl's heart, and her attitude as she does so makes me certain that she faked that first simper. Tease.

Bronze. Dingoes plays. Devon "sings." Oz looks cute. Willow dorks out to the music as she happily tells Xander she's a groupie. Internet geek that you are, Willow, I'd expect you to be a stalker. Okay, so the bad jokes aren't limited to puns. Sue me. Cordy enters, and tries to greet the Cordexes, who sniff and walk away as though Cordy just yelled "move yer bloomin' arse!" at poor Dover. Cordy, left out of high society, looks bummed.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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