Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Episode Report Card
Strega: C | 2 USERS: B
All wet

Legion of Dim. Jonathan thinks it's sad that they're planning to kill Buffy. Warren calls Jonathan "Whineathan," but Andrew expresses some hesitation about the murder plot as well. Jonathan notes, "She saved my life a bunch of times! Plus she's hot." Warren says that it's Buffy or them, and continues, "We're talking about staying alive, and since this is my mom's house, I think what I say goes." Andrew worries that they might get in trouble, and Warren notes that bank-robbing isn't terribly approved-of either. Jonathan reminds everyone that Buffy has "super-strength." Andrew says that killing people isn't the reason they got together. Jonathan reminds Warren of their "clear, super-cool mission statement," triggering a flashback. They're all in the basement, gathered around a gameboard, as Warren asks, "So...you guys wanna team up and take over Sunnydale?" Andrew and Jonathan look at each other and reply, "Okay." End flashback. Heh. While the bored demon watches in the background, Warren says, "Of course I remember. It was last month." Jonathan reminds him of their mission, and points to a whiteboard which contains their to-do list. It reads: "Control the weather, miniaturize Fort Knox, conjure fake IDs, shrink ray, girls, girls, the gorilla thing." Jonathan describes the last item as "Trained gorillas," which is considerably less mysterious than "the gorilla thing." He also reads one item that isn't there: "Workable prototype jet-packs." Warren demands that they vote, and Andrew and Jonathan vote against killing Buffy by raising their hands in Vulcan salutes. Warren reluctantly raises his hand as well. Jonathan wonders what they'll do with the demon, and Warren says he has an idea. He hurries over to the demon and hands it a piece of paper, whispering, "Here's the Slayer's name, address, and telephone number. You wanna kill her? Make it so." Why'd he just happen to have that in his pocket? The demon takes the paper and exits. Warren turns around as Jonathan and Andrew stare at him with wonder. Andrew asks if Warren is "some kind of Jedi." Warren intones, "The Force can sometimes have great power on the weak-minded." Maybe this crew should go to David Nabbit for funding. And, to reiterate my Nabbit-related complaints, and add some new ones...this is a show with a big geeky fan base. It was also originally a show about how it feels to be the weirdo. So making fun of an easy target like geeks doesn't sit well. Particularly when it's a thrown-together series of clichés. Geeks play role-playing games! And like science fiction! And dress badly! And hang out in basements! They also read comic books, but of course, Whedon writes comics now, so we wouldn't want to make fun of that. This seems like a one-joke idea that will be dragged out for ages. Kind of like Anya.

Giles strolls into the kitchen with a towel over his shoulder. Willow is pulling a box of cookies out of the cupboard. She sits at the counter and dives in as Giles asks about the spell she did to resurrect Buffy. Willow reminds us that, essentially, a snake came out of her mouth and they were attacked by demons and then, poof, Buffy was back. Giles mutters, "You're a very stupid girl." Go, Giles! Willow's taken aback. He continues, "Do you have any idea what you've done? The forces you've harnessed? The lines you've crossed?" Willow, hurt, sniffs that she thought Giles would be impressed. Giles sarcastically admits that Willow has indeed "made a very deep impression." He says that she's the one he trusted to respect the forces of nature, and Willow gasps, "Are you saying you don't trust me?" Giles says that Willow took a big risk. Willow wonders, "Risk? Of what? Making her deader?" Giles pickily ticks off pesky items like, "Killing us all. Unleashing hell on Earth." Willow insists that she did what had to be done, what nobody else could do. Giles, quite angry, says, "There are others in the world who can do what you did. You just don't want to meet them." Willow blindly responds, "Probably not, but, well, they're the bad guys. I am not a bad guy. I brought Buffy back into this world, and maybe the word you should be looking for is 'congratulations.'" Giles admits that he's happy that Buffy is back, but adds, "I wouldn't congratulate you if you jumped off a cliff and happened to survive." He says Willow was lucky, and she fires back with, "I wasn't lucky, I was amazing! And how would you know? You weren't even there!" Giles says that if he'd been there, he'd have stopped her, and rants about how the magic she used was "more primal and ferocious than [she] can hope to understand." He finishes, "You're lucky to be alive, you rank, arrogant amateur!" He heads for the door, but Willow quietly says, "You're right. The magicks I used are very powerful. I'm very powerful. And maybe it's not such a good idea for you to piss me off." Ha. Five long years of hating Willow are finally justified! Giles stares at her, and after a moment Willow continues, in a lighter tone, "I don't want to fight. Let's not, okay? I'll think about what you said, and you...try to be happy Buffy's back." Giles ignores Willow's outburst and quietly answers, "We still don't know where she was or what happened to her." Johanna says that if we have to choose between nice, cutesy, talking like a five-year-old Willow and creepy, Giles-threatening, speaking-in-a-normal-voice Willow, she'd prefer to have Creepy Willow. Me too, especially if there's any chance it'll lead to dead, rotting, not-talking-at-all Willow. Hey, I can hope.

We cut to the porch, where Buffy stands as we hear Giles say, "And I'm far from convinced she's come out of all this undamaged." How much Buffy heard of that conversation is terribly unclear. The entire episode has had dialogue overlapping scenes, but based on what happens here, it seems as if this time it was done as a plot point. In which case, maybe that should have been made more explicit. Buffy stares out at the night, and a cigarette butt suddenly lands by her feet. She grinds it out with her toe and greets Brad. Brad, you'll remember, is Spike's identical twin, who has a lot in common with Spike except that Brad is kind, and trustworthy, and not at all evil. You know: Brad! Boy, if Spike ever returns to Sunnydale and finds out how Brad has been ruining his reputation, heads are gonna roll. I can't wait for that episode! But Spike's off somewhere, reunited with Drusilla, having a good time killing people and causing mayhem. In the meantime, we've got Brad. Who's cute and all, and, let's not forget, very old, but he's just no Spike. Yes, my powers of denial are fearsome to behold.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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