Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Episode Report Card
Ace: C | 2 USERS: A
Him? Huh.

Dawn races out the front doors of the school, all sad and shit. As she collapses onto a bench, crying, Xander wanders up to her. He inquires, "Is this…did that guy in the jacket…?" "Dawn protests that she doesn't want to hear RJ's name, and Xander's all confused because he only referred to RJ as "that guy in the jacket." "That's what I used to call him in my head before I knew his real name!" melodramas Dawn. I'm so beyond caring about Dawn's pathetic little problems. This episode feels like it's lasted for a year and a day already. Xander suggests that he fetch Buffy to help, and Dawn gets all snarly, saying that her crying is about both Buffy and that guy in the jacket.

Moany sounds. Blech. Xander bursts into the classroom and finds RJ and Buffy swapping spit. RJ's sprawled across a desk and Buffy is perched on top of him (on his stomach, not his groin, or at least that's what I'm telling myself). Her shirt is unbuttoned and hanging partway off. I'm really just kinda sad to see Buffy, after all she's been through the past year or so, being treated by the writers in such a cavalier fashion. Fine -- make boring fun of Dawn and put her in humiliating, typical teenage situations. I don't care. But having poor Buffy, in her sad little capacity as entirely inappropriate school counselor, sexually molest a student at the school where she's employed is just not funny and seems to be an indignity the character doesn't deserve. The fact that she's under a spell can't wipe away the bad taste this disrespect leaves in my mouth. Xander stops short in horror at the sight of Buffy's pony ride. Buffy takes the opportunity to introduce RJ, and RJ chides Xander for not knocking. Xander snaps back, "It's a classroom, you chowderhead." Turning to leave, he adds, "Now get off the boy, Buffy. We're going home." A line made funny by good delivery on Nick's part.

Summers living room. Dawn sobs on the sofa while Buffy ever-so-concernedly tries to reassure her by saying, "Crying isn't going to make his love for me go away, you know." Uh, okay. Xander, Anya, and Willow stand nearby, and Xander suggests that a love spell is at work here. Buffy says he's right, but then indicates that she thinks only Dawn is under the spell. Obviously, Buffy's love is real. Willow says they're working on breaking the spell, and Anya refers to RJ as a boy, incurring Buffy and Dawn's ire. Anya, Willow, and Xander head across the room to do research. Dawn nasals that the love comes from her heart, not magic, and then snaps at Buffy for betraying her. In this half of the episode, SMG has chosen to play Buffy just like the Buffybot, but without the amusing, spirited bits. She morons back to Dawn, "I betrayed you? You're the one who constructed this elaborate fantasy about you and my lover." Again, what I said about the show not having earned this sort of broad satire when it's sucked so very much for so very long. Dawn leaps up, screaming, "Your lover?" contemptuously, which was very much like my reaction the first time I saw this episode. Blah blah blah, Dawn's all emotional and frustrated and heartbroken, and Buffy just continues to respond all not-getting-it and roboty. Dawn says Buffy wasn't "supposed to do this" to her because she trusted her, and then stomps off. Buffy runs after her.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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