Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Episode Report Card
Ace: C | 2 USERS: A
Him? Huh.

Cut to outside the school. Spike races along with the bazooka; Buffy is still in hot pursuit. They find Xander and Willow waiting for them at Xander's car. Willow's casting a "human locater" spell, presumably to find Dawn and Anya. Buffy's all irate that they interrupted her principal-killing activities.

Dawn's lying on the train tracks. Train whistle blows. Dawn blows too, pretty much. Xander pulls up near the tracks, and he, Spike, Buffy, and Willow all tumble out of the car. Buffy's more concerned about Anya getting a crack at RJ than about where her sister is, and Willow whines that she shouldn't "miss out" on whatever "recently evil" hijinks Anya is getting up to. Xander points out that Dawn is lying on the tracks and a train is approaching. Everyone just stands around and stares for a while, not feeling the urgency of rescuing Dawn, I guess. I can get behind that. Finally Buffy runs off to do so, and what follows is some incredibly murky action. I'm not sure if it's supposed to build suspense, or is just poorly edited. We think that there's only one train track and that for some reason Buffy is hopping a ride on the train that's about to squash Dawn like a new penny, but actually Buffy is running along on top of another train going to the opposite direction on a parallel track. It doesn't make much sense, but she rescues Dawn just in time. As one or the other of the trains rushes by, Buffy screams at Dawn for trying to off herself. "What am I, going to compete with you?" demands Dawn. "You're older and hotter and have sex that's rough and kill people. I don't have any of that stuff." Maybe I'm not a very open person, but I know I can live without my sister having that sort of intimate knowledge about what kind of sex I have. Dawn claims that she was going to die so RJ would always know that she loved him enough to give up her life for him. Doesn't that usually work better when you give up your life in a useful, "rescuing the other person" sort of way? "No guy is worth your life, not ever," admonishes Buffy, conveniently forgetting all about how, in high school, she was willing to let Angel drain her to live. Buffy continues that Dawn is scaring her so much that she'd give her RJ if she could. Then she reneges a little on that and finally realizes that she too must be under a spell.

Xander and Spike sneak along a Sunnydale street. They peer through a store window and spot RJ walking along, accompanied by a cheerleader. With great seriousness, Xander says to Spike, "Now you're sure you understand the plan?" "I think I got it, yeah," whispers Spike conspiratorially. Then he and Xander take off running madly towards RJ. Xander grabs him around the middle and holds him still while Spike grabs the jacket and pulls it off of RJ's shoulders. Jacket secured, Xander and Spike dash off quickly. Hee. Another funny bit. So why did the first thirty-seven minutes of this episode suck so bad?

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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