Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Nightmares

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B+ | 7 USERS: B-
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Classroom. Cordelia "I Can't Remember The Last Time I Got Carded" Chase is checking her make-up in a hand mirror when a shadow passes over her. She chastises a boy (that's a stretch -- he looks older than she does) who's got his hair pulled back in a manner that on TV screams "sensitive eccentric." Xander "Hormones Are A Boy's Best Friend" Harris appears: "Wendell, what is wrong with you? Don't you know that she is the center of the universe and the rest of us merely revolve around her?" Cordy: "You finally learned something worth knowing." Well, she said that with her facial expression. Buffy and Willow enter, and are informed about the getting-in-Cordy's-light incident. Willow: "Why is she so Evita-like?" Buffy: "I think it's the hair." Heh. Xander asks if there was any homework, and I seriously wonder why he didn't just start that contracting career at age sixteen. Willow says they're doing "active listening." I prefer "active ignoring" and "active hating," but that's just me. Xander wonders what active listening is, and even Buffy is totally like, "Duh!" She, Willow, and Wendell explain that it was the homework, and that their teacher, Miss Tischler, demonstrated it the previous day with him. Buffy says that Miss Tischler was wearing a tight sweater. Xander: "Oh, the midnight blue angora! See, I was listening." Uh, has he already forgotten "Teacher's Pet"? Then again, that episode sucked. Sars, have you forgotten it yet? ["I had until just now, JACKASS." -- Sars] We see Miss Tischler, who's been shopping at the same clothing stores as Miss French. Tight white sweater and leopard-print skirt. I guess she didn't want Buffy's dinners to get all the attention. She mentions active listening, and Xander goes for the dork gold medal five minutes in by cupping his hands around his ears. And I'm sure they're not the only things perking up, thanks to the sweater. Buffy and Willow snicker to each other. The teacher's amused, because this is TV. She lectures a bit, and as she does, Buffy drops her pencil. When she leans over to pick it up, she sees a young boy standing in the doorway. Scary music plays. The teacher asks Wendell to read a passage from the textbook. He opens his copy, and several large spiders scuttle out of it. He yells, and everyone starts screaming, the teacher most loudly. Way to keep cool in a crisis. There's a quick, hilarious shot of the teacher and Cordy standing side by side screaming their heads off, made even funnier by the fact that Cordy looks older than the teacher. Wendell screams for someone to help him. The boy looks on impassively. "Sorry about that."

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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