Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Reptile Boy

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: C+ | 7 USERS: C-
YOU GRADE IT
...or are you just happy to see me?

Buffy walks outside. I hope there's no breeze, because the length of Buffy's dress is not familiar with the term "margin for error." She picks up a piece of broken glass, and looks up at the window Callie jumped through at the beginning of the episode, which is boarded up. Tom appears behind her. He asks if she's okay, and she says she was just thinking. Richard comes out of the house, blathering something about Argentinean junk bonds that hilariously dates the episode, and hands Buffy and Tom each a drink. Tom, looking askance at Richard, toasts maturity. Buffy says she's over maturity, and downs her drink in one gulp. So Buffy's drunk twice on the show that I can remember, and has had two near-death experiences. I'm lucky I don't live in the Jossverse -- I'd probably have to cheat death two or three times a day. And let's not even start on all the smoking and the gay sex.

In the library, Willow and Giles are trying to figure out what word was on the full bracelet. Willow eventually realizes that the bracelet is from Kent, a nearby prep school. She pulls up Kent's school newsletter, and discovers an article about Callie's disappearance. Back at The Meathead Lair Of Love, Kurt and Ram are dolling Xander up with lipstick, a blonde wig, and a stuffed bra that could provide ample shade for a small child. They make him dance. Buffy appears from a doorway, and doesn't look well. She staggers up the stairs. Boys and girls alike whoop it up for Xander. Ram paddles his ass. That's slightly funny. Buffy opens the door to an empty room, lies down on the bed, and passes out. Richard enters, and leers at Buffy's prone form. He sits down on the bed. Oh, ew. Inexplicably, he sticks his thumb out, and advances it toward her. Huh?

We never learn why Richard favors that particular digit, because Tom enters and throws Richard off Buffy. After a bit of chivalrous misdirection, Tom reveals that Buffy is there solely for "the pleasure of the one we serve." Richard hesitantly responds, "In his name." Tom says that goes for the other one too. The camera pans right to reveal that Cordy is passed out next to the bed. I guess you could call her "Snore-delia." The sad thing is, I thought of that one weeks ago, and this is the best opportunity I'm likely to have to use it. Sorry. I think I'll steer attention away from my incredibly lame joke by pointing out a teeny tiny plot hole in this episode. I can accept that the frat boys kidnapped Callie without anyone finding out about it. Fine. But tons of people knew that Buffy and Cordy were coming to this party -- together, for God's sack. Wouldn't it be a little too suspicious? Wouldn't the boys have picked a target that wouldn't, you know, lead directly to themselves? So that's my teeny tiny plot hole. And by "teeny tiny," I mean "visible from space."

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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