Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Surprise (1)

Episode Report Card
Surprise (1)

Buffy is tossing and turning in her bed. She startles herself awake (holy eye-shadow, Batman!) and turns on the lamp so we have a better view of her reaching for her water glass. Finding it empty, she gets up to refill it. While Buffy's walking down the hall, Drusilla turns a corner and creeps up behind her. Drusilla has a spot of blood on the ass-crack of her lip. There has to be a better word for that. Buffy opens the door to the bathroom but instead finds herself in the Bronze. She walks through the crowd to see Willow sharing a table with an organ grinder's monkey. In French, because what is a dream sequence without a bit of French, Willow says to the monkey, "The hippo stole his pants." Willow catches sight of Buffy and, smiling wide, waves at her in an excited Willow-esque manner. Buffy continues onward to see Joyce standing by a pillar with an oversized cup and saucer in her hands. Joyce says, "Do you really think you're ready, Buffy?" and then drops her saucer. Buffy watches it fall and shatter while Joyce turns and walks away. Buffy walks some more and then turns to see Angel. They smile and walk towards each other, but just then Drusilla appears behind Angel with a stake held high. She plunges it deep into him from behind and Buffy yells out, "Angel!" They reach towards each other, their fingertips not quite touching, but Angel begins to disintegrate, crumbling, his rings tumbling to the floor. Drusilla approaches Buffy and wishes her a happy birthday. In her room Buffy wakes up, for real this time.

There's a knocking at the door of Angel's apartment, Tacky City. I've gotten most of my furniture off of the street and my apartment is still decorated better than Angel's. He opens it to reveal a worried Buffy. Buffy's skirt is short. Way short. You know how for a long time scientists thought that atoms were the smallest particle of matter until they discovered quarks? Well, that's Buffy's micro-mini. It's the quark of micro-minis. Buffy asks Angel if he's okay, and after he assures her that he's fine, he goes to grab a shirt. Buffy tells Angel about her dream, and he strokes her cheek and tells her that he's right there. Buffy isn't having it and reminds Angel that she does have prophetic dreams, but Angel counters that it's a hit-and-miss thing. Buffy is still agitated and says, "But what if Drusilla is alive? We never saw her body." Angel: "She's not. But even if she was, we'd deal." Buffy protests some more but Angel, having exhausted his repertoire -- he's not made for extended conversation -- grabs her and lays one on. Smack, slurp, smooch. Buffy has to go to school. Smooch, slurp, smack. Angel reminds Buffy that she has to go to school. Slurp, smack, smooch. Buffy tells Angel that she likes "seeing [him] at bedtime" and that "the part at the end of the night where we say good-bye. It's getting harder." Harder to watch, maybe.

Cut to Willow and Buffy walking across campus. True-to-form of high school girls everywhere, they dissect the conversation that Buffy just had with Angel. Buffy wonders to Willow what she should do about Angel, and Willow advises her to seize the day. Buffy responds, "Right. I think we're going to. Seize it. Once you get to a certain point then seizing is sort of inevitable." Huh. That sounds a tad unpleasant, but hey, it's Angel, King of Pain, so I'm not surprised if he's into that. Willow gets all "wow" to Buffy and they start walking to class. Buffy notices Oz sitting on a table practicing guitar. Willow crushes aloud to Buffy for a moment but then seems worried that Oz, being a senior, is too old for her. Buffy: "Please. My boyfriend had a bicentennial." And you look like you've got one coming up too, Buffy. I mean, what is up with that hair? The young matron cut and the ash-blonde dye aren't helping your cause. Buffy advises Willow that she can't "spend the rest of [her] life waiting for Xander to wake up and smell the hottie. Make a move." Buffy takes off; Willow considers her options for a moment before finally approaching Oz. He says hello and they make some small talk, but let's get to the good stuff. Just as Willow is starting to feel a little awkward, Oz says, "I'm gonna ask you to go out with me tomorrow night and I'm kind of nervous about it, actually. It's interesting." Willow: "Oh. Well, if it helps at all, I'm going to say yes." Oz says that it "creates a comfort zone," and then proceeds to ask her out. Willow smacks her forehead in frustration and says that she can't. Oz: "Well, see, I like that you're unpredictable." Willow tells him that she has to go to a surprise party for Buffy's birthday and invites him to go as her date. Oz gives a little half-smile at Willow's word choice. He agrees to go, and Willow walks off repeating "I said 'date'" to herself. Let's all take a moment to sigh dreamily at what is the best execution of pre-first-date maneuvering in the entire history of the world. ["Willow and Oz make me swoon. Sigh." -- Ace]

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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