Buffy the Vampire Slayer
This Year's Girl (1)

Episode Report Card
This Year's Girl (1)

Somebody just give me the address where I can send my nine bucks so they will stop showing previews of Reindeer Games on my television. They can't make me watch the movie but I'm willing to pay to not see any more of it.

Faith is playing with Joyce's lipsticks in her bedroom. She says to Joyce, who is sitting on the bed, that she usually wouldn't wear such a dark color but she has heard that an eight month long coma will damage your skintone. Yeah? Well, I read that after an eight month long coma you'd have your muscles atrophy and suffer from brain damage. Faith wants to ask Joyce a question and she wants to know the truth. "How do I look?" queries Faith. "Psychotic," retorts Joyce. Go Joyce! It's nice to see her again. Too bad we also have to see that hideous sweater. Obviously Joyce also dressed better when Buffy was in high school. Faith says that Joyce is thinking that Faith will never get away with it, but Joyce corrects her and says that she's betting that Buffy is going to kill Faith soon. Faith calls her bluff by picking up a stack of mail and makes a flying leap onto the bed by Joyce. She randomly tosses letter after letter in the air all addressed to Buffy. She tries to undermine Joyce's confidence by saying essentially that if Buffy cared about her she would have warned her about Faith's return. Joyce isn't having any of it though, and says that Faith, "doesn't know the first thing about Buffy or [Joyce]." Faith prattles on about how hard it is to be left behind and nobody cared about you anymore wah wah wah. Faith, here's a tip: People might like to hang out with you more if they could do so without fearing for their lives. Just a thought. Joyce is sick of hearing Faith's deranged views as she icily asks, "Are you planning on slitting my throat anytime soon?" Faith ignores her and says, "You're her mother and she just leaves you here to die!" as she grabs a knife. At that moment Lassie comes home to save the day. Actually, it was Buffy barreling through the window but it was a very Lassie type move. Isn't Joyce's bedroom on the second floor? Anyway. Buffy knocks Faith down and brightly says, "Hi Mom," and starts to struggle with Faith. She takes a painful looking knee to the face (I just typed 'faith' there. Somebody help me, my fingers are lisping) but quickly takes the fight into the hallway. Joyce takes this opportunity to call 911, which may or may not be a joke in Sunnydale. Buffy and Faith fall down the stairs clenched together and I have to send my condolences to their stunt doubles. That looked painful. Now in the dining room, they intersperse their physical sparring with verbal jabs as well. Faith makes a comment about Riley and Buffy tells her that, "He's not big on sleaze." Faith, who has Buffy at an arm's length choke hold against the wall, says it's probably because he's never tried it. Buffy: "Going for the boyfriend again? That's tired." Faith tries to punch Buffy but she dodges in time and Faith just gets a handful of drywall. Buffy clears the table with Faith and preys on her insecurities saying, "Did it ever occur to you, Faith, that the reason we all forgot you was because we wanted to?" I didn't forget you, Faith. I'll never forget you. Even though you're criminally insane and I refuse to make excuses for your violent tendencies, it doesn't make mean I love you any less. Faith throws a vase at Buffy and then takes a drawer and lobs that in her direction, too. Faith picks up some knives from the spilled contents of the drawer and tries to play darts with Buffy. What is it with this girl and knives? If she really wanted to kill Buffy she'd just get an illegal gun off the street and take care of it. She obviously just wants to play. Unfortunately playing darts with Buffy is a bit more difficult since the target is moving.

Over at Giles's he opens (not unlocks) the door to his dark apartment. He flips a switch but it does nothing. Suddenly his desk lamp is turned on to reveal the guys from the helicopter. The one sitting at Giles's desk greets him and I can't tell if he calls him Ripper or Rupert. Since my closed-captioning sucks dick for drug money I guess I'll never know. I'm going to assume they're from the council though. Ace and I were wondering why, if the Council has burly men like these working for them, they ever sent Wesley to be the new watcher. I'm starting to believe Strega's Outreach Program theory. On the phone Ace suggested that perhaps these guys are the brawn and Wesley was the brain. Yeah, we had a good laugh over that too.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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