Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Episode Report Card

Willow, Xander, and Buffy discuss Amy's surprised reaction in a school hallway. Willow suggests that Amy isn't the witch, but Buffy insists that she is and is perhaps unaware of her powers. Buffy proposes to talk to Amy's mother about the situation. Which she doesn't actually ever do. Buffy really did take her Slayer duties more lightly in the past.

We see Amy walking up to her house and entering the yard through a large gate decorated with a grinning devil's head. She opens the front door and enters, slamming the door behind her. As she's about to climb the stairs, she gets a menacing smirk on her face and demands, "Where are you?" In the living room, Amy's mother comes hurrying out, obviously terrified. Amy sneers at her mother for spending the day in front of the television and then snottily orders her mother to write her history report for her. Amy muses that she should be on the cheerleading team by now, but blames Buffy for interfering with her plans. Catherine Madison appears about to speak, but just opens and closes her mouth. We see that Amy has the bracelet Xander gave Buffy. She looks at it appraisingly and says she's going upstairs. After she leaves, Catherine Madison lets out a sigh and slumps a little. ["Isn't this plot taken wholesale from the Twilight Zone movie -- including the girl-with-no-mouth part?" -- Sars]

The camera sneaks along the floor of Buffy's room, past a jumble of girlish clutter. Buffy herself lies sleeping, but one of the largest suspension-of-disbelief problems I have with first-season Buffy is that anyone would actually sleep on pillow with elaborate old-fashioned crocheted covers. You might have them on your bed, but would toss them aside at bedtime, unless you fancied waking up looking like a puffy scar-face. Buffy's alarm goes off and she reaches out to shut it off, smashing the clock instead. Buffy enters the kitchen, wearing her cheerleading uniform and warbling "Macho Man" by the Village People. She bounces perkily through the kitchen, swinging her ponytail, and gulps a glass of juice. I reflect, for the umpteenth time this summer, on how much more attractive and healthy-looking SMG used to be. Buffy tells her mom she's excited to be on the squad, and when her mother tries to apologize for the day before, Buffy cuts her off, saying, "That's totally yester." Joyce tries to discuss it again but Buffy starts to ramble that there are "just some things about being a vampire slayer that the older generation --" Joyce breaks in, demanding to know if Buffy feels okay, but Buffy just continues her spazz and perks her way right out of the kitchen, still singing "Macho Man."

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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