Deadwood
Amalgamation And Capital

Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: D | 9 USERS: A
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Amalgamation And Capital

Meanwhile, E.B. employs the well-proven "pretending to look around" school of spying (most famously used by great detectives such as Nancy Drew and Harriet the Spy) to try to find out what Miss Iz is sending. He is met with a fabulous "Fuck off" from our favorite foul-mouthed steamboat captain.

Merrick jauntily enters the Gem, all good cheer over having been so easily bought by Al Swearengen. Al ignores Merrick, instead soliloquizing to Dan that "the truth, if only a pinch, must season every falsehood, or the palate fuckin' rebels. And mustn't the novice chef be mindful not to ladle out his concoction by the unseasoned fucking ton lest before he perfect his art he lose his clientele?" Jeffrey Jones's reaction shots here are great as Merrick realizes that being a sellout might not pay as well as he originally thought. Al marches upstairs without addressing Merrick, and Dan mutters that, for his part, he'd "like the ball scores a little more fuckin' prompt."

Merrick, surprisingly, grows a pair and follows Al upstairs, yelling that he'd better not go in his office. What follows are a number of non sequiturs as Al and Merrick yell at one another about being or not being born yesterday and having or not having an adult conversation. Meanwhile, Ellsworth has come in and is watching all this, wide-eyed. Al shoves his door open, hooks his glasses on his lip -- for all the world like my strict second-grade teacher -- and motions for Merrick to go in. Merrick exchanges a nervous look with Ellsworth downstairs, and enters. I have to say, I'm not a huge fan of the new Dr. Phil Al (Dr. Al?) -- all motivational speech and management through reason -- but I like how this scene shows us how scary his office is for most everyone. I think we'd forgotten after the whole gleet thing.

Ellsworth gives Dan Alma's letter, telling him he won't wait for Al but that Dan better tell Al "he'd best not serve the sender ill." Tough talk! Upon leaving, though, Ellsworth manhandles a little leather file-folder, which is like the nineteenth-century equivalent of storming out of someone else's cubicle -- i.e., not really tough at all.

E.B. greases up to Al's door, only to be told that Al's busy with Merrick inside. And I swear these writers write these tiny little scenes just to make the recapper's life a living hell.

Inside Al's office, Al explains to Merrick that the newspaper article contained too many "possibilities" and "would make people smell a rat." Well, Al, if the scent fits. Pouring them each a shot, Al tells Merrick that "these interests, coming after us, they're fucking rough! They're going after our nuts, they're hypocrite cocksuckers. And the fucking lying tactics and instruments they use to fuck people up the ass can be turned against them." Frankly, I'd like to hire Al to give this talk to the Democratic Party. Merrick realizes what Al wants him to do, that his newspaper is one of the ass-fucking instruments, and really starts getting into this dirty game. Al commands him to drink his second shot and Merrick says, "I like my fucking liquor...and I like stinkin' of fuckin' ink, too...give it a fuckin' smell, Al." I have to admit, while I love the new direction Merrick's character is taking, I'm not sure I want to hear Jeffrey Jones uttering things like "Give it a fuckin' smell, Al." Because, ew. For a variety of reasons, perhaps best left unsaid out of respect for the Ferris Bueller fans among us.

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Deadwood

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