The Catbird Seat

Episode Report Card
Al Lowe: A | 6 USERS: A
The Catbird Seat

Jewel is messing around in the Gem's kitchen when she is surprised by Richardson. "Goddamn it, Richardson," she admonishes him. "You're too ugly to be sneaking up on fucking people." Aw, man. Richardson holds a basket out in front of him, saying its from Mrs. Marchbanks. "We got all the fucking food we need," Jewel snaps, though she does step closer to the basket. "Who the fuck is Mrs. Marchbanks anyway?" Richardson: "It's Aunt Leeeww." Jewel sighs. "I guess I'd know her for Mrs. Marchbanks if she took time to introduce herself," she says, grudgingly taking the food and telling him to thank Lou. "Tell her my fucking name's Miss Caulfield," she says to his back as he leaves, and then pausing, to herself: "I think." Brilliant. And all it does is make me sick with anger -- can you imagine future seasons of this show when Aunt Lou and Richardson and Jewel become like the Three Musketeers and open a restaurant together? Could have happened! Right? I mean, maybe, and just how awesome? But, nooooo, no. We need more seasons of Tony Soprano, breathing all over everybody and, dare I say it again, those damn Entourage BITCHES and their stupid hair gel.

Langrishe enters the Gem as the boys and Charlie Utter sit around with Al, listening to him lay out the current state of things. He says that the terms have become clear to him. If Alma would keep her property, but leave, she could hire as many guns as Hearst has hired. They wouldn't be disadvantaged by having to protect her, since she'd be gone, so everything would at least be equal. However, he says, if she plans to stay in Deadwood, she needs to sell her claim to Hearst. Jack puts a hand on Al's shoulder, congratulating him for so pithily explaining it all, and Al, exhausted by the mental gymnastics, actually smiles as he sips his tea. Beautiful.

Upstairs, though, no one is smiling. Still clinging to her mother, Sophia whispers that she wants to feel Ellsworth's beard one more time. "Mr. Ellsworth," Alma says sadly, "is with God now, Sophia." (You're a stone if you're not crying. No, you're a statue. No! You're like, a statue of...Mussolini if this doesn't slay you.) "I want to feel his beard," Sophia tells her, "so I can pray that he's saying goodbye to me."

Little James is "it" in a game of Duck, Duck, Goose back at the schoolhouse. He tags Jane, who chases him gamely around the circle as his classmates cheer. She fails to catch him. "Outflanked by a boy half my size," she laughs. "Next time I'll get you, James!" They are all having big fun and even Joanie looks happy.

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