Friday Night Lights

Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: B | 4 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
Lost In America

Panther football field. Smash makes a good catch of Saracen's good throw. New Coke only points out Smash's catch - "See that boys? Thing of beauty!" Jason tries to stroke Matt's little kitty ears by reassuring him that it was a good toss, too. Tim Riggins decides to make some more sexy mischief and asks New Coke whether he's a thing of beauty, too. The team laughs, and New Coke asks him if he can count to fifty. Tim, stupidly, answers yes and New Coke sends him off to run fifty stairs.

Practice music montage. Landry gets crushed. Repeatedly. And then some more. A man, in what looks like a park ranger uniform, looks on. It's Landry's dad, the cop! Landry walks toward him, and Dad tells him he looks good out there. Landry thinks he must be watching somebody else. Dad says that he just needs to give it time, that he's on the team and that's all that matters. He's real proud of him. Oh, Dad. Didn't you know that by being a stern and unforgiving father on a televised teen soap you'd without doubt turn that boy into a lead pipe murderer? We all saw it coming, why didn't you?

Jason shows a friendly doctor how he can grasp a pen in his hand. This is major progress. Jason fishes for news that he'll walk again. The doctor is cautious, telling Jason to keep up the good work on the physical therapy, improving his muscle function. He reminds him that this improvement is not indicative of others. Jason maintains an undeterred, goofy smile on his face as he starts, "Yeah, but who's to say?" when the doctor interrupts him: "I am. Jason you are not going to walk again." He continues, as we cut to Jason dejectedly wheeling himself out, "At least not without a major medical breakthrough that we are years away from."

Jason runs into a new Xtreme Sportz friend in the waiting room, who just happens to be the real-life Murderball guy, Mark Zupan. Jason hangs his head and tells Zupan that he just got informed -- again -- that he'll never walk again. Zupan first provides some much-needed wise commiseration and then tells Jason that he knows of a guy who's doing some really great experimental stem cell surgeries down in Mexico. Where, specifically? Oh, I guess, it's probably just at Hollywood Upstairs Medical College, Tijuana Campus.

Grandma is sitting all up on her television, trying to do her chair exercises while nervously yelling toward the back of the house that somebody needs to get out of her house, that this is the time she does her exercises! We're led to believe Grandma is yelling at imaginary people. Matt comes home from school to hear her calling for help and tries to settle her down by telling her there's nobody there. Except FACE HARD Matt! There is someone there, a pretty woman in nurses scrubs. She introduces herself as "Carlotta Alonda, the nurse you demanded." How would she know he "demanded" a nurse? That's a silly way to establish attitude on her part. She's busting around the house, throwing trash into bags, and ripping Grandma's pudding cups out of her hands. She's tough, but fair! She's doing a lot of yelling for a nurse. I hope we aren't going into angry Latina territory here. Matt says she should leave the television on because it's the only thing that keeps Grandma calm, and Carlotta very uncalmly swings around and yells, "It's destroying her mind!" She apologizes for losing her cool and then asks where she's going to sleep because she's going to live there. Matt and Grandma look shocked, but Grandma might just be surprised that there's Mexicans in Texas.

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Friday Night Lights

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