Friday Night Lights

Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: B | 3 USERS: C+
I'm So Confused
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Open on a shot of the wide-open blue Texas sky, a football flying through the air. T. Rex's "Bang A Gong" plays; the football falls through the sky accompanied by the song's jaunty guitar, and we follow it as it falls right into the hands of a shirtless boy leaping through the air and falling beautifully right into a crystalline pool. The camera pulls back and starts ranging around the pool in slow motion. Tim Riggins floats on a raft wearing aviators and a straw cowboy hat, flanked by lovely ladies; Smash holds court in the shallow end. Matt Saracen sits at the side of the pool with Landry, looking intently across at Julie, who is smoking hott in a red lifeguard one-piece. Julie, chin tucked coyly, doesn't return Matt's gaze, but instead watches another lifeguard as he walks in slow motion toward her, smiling.

Matt wonders aloud to Landry why Julie is "staring at him like that" and says since she's his girlfriend and all, she shouldn't be "lookin' at Swedish people" so much. Intrigue! Who is this dark brunet Swede?! Landry tells Matt that he just needs to ask himself: "WWRD -- what would Riggins do?" Matt is quick to point out that Riggins would not even be in this situation: "Riggins is captain of the S.S. Ta-Tas over there." Please note that, as Matt gestures toward Riggins floating around in his own personal Lady Boat, he does so using a pool noodle that's been wrapped in a knot. Aw, Matt, are you trying to indicate something to us? Landry nods in agreement, observing in amazement that Riggins has probably slept with half the girls in their school, "Not to mention some of their moms...and sisters." Hey, I've seen Ole' Sis. I'm not so sure that's gold-star material there.

Smash calls over to Matt with the usual SmashTalk -- "Just ride my coattails this season." Matt responds with only a sarcastically goofy grin back at Smash, but Landry calls out "Hey Smash!" clearly just trying to curry favor. Matt asks Landry why he's such a tool; as Landry stutters in response, he's stopped short in his own inarticulate stuttering when he catches a glimpse of -- we see as the camera swings around -- Tyra Collette, in a teeny bikini, pushing up a deep red Rocket Pop and sucking on it in slow motion. Let me join Landry in observing: "Ooooh, myyyy, Gooooddd."

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Friday Night Lights




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