Friday Night Lights

Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: A+ | 5 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Birds, Bees and The Giving Tree

Game time! The Bisons play dirty, dirty, dirty. Coach is up in the referees' business, but they ignore him. In the huddle, Tim tells everyone that they've just got to suck it up, just like Leslie Mann says. Play starts again, and the opposing team is throwing dirt in the Panthers' faces, grabbing face masks, the whole bit. Matt Saracen gets totally tackled as he goes to catch a ball, and its clearly pass interference, but the refs don't call it. Coach is sashaying up and down the sidelines losing his shit: "How could you not see that? You gotta be kidding me!" Next play, J.D. gets totally roughed up after he throws the pass. Everyone in the stands is booing and Coach has decided that in a life over which he has little to no control -- no job security, no daughter security -- this is one thing he can take charge of: he gets in the ref's face and calls him a "no-calling son of a bitch!" The ref throws a flag, but Coach keeps going. The ref throws him out of the game; Tami's in the stands, her eyes wide at her husband losing it like this. Coach shoves the playbook into Wade's hands and walks off the field. Buddy's on the sidelines looking rough in a plaid flannel shirt; he's freaking out, too. You take football away from these guys, and all they've got is a bunch of confusing females in their lives.

Coach walks away from the field as the announcers exposit that he'll have to sit the rest of the game out in the locker room. But Coach heads straight for what looks like a little trailer or bunker just behind the stadium; when he walks in, it's a bar, which is kind of hilarious. Think back on your high school's football stadium. Was there a bar within twenty feet of it? No, there was not. Because that would mean, pretty much, that the bar was on school property. Texas just gets better and better. So, a coach walks in the bar...

There's a tv in there, so Eric can see what's going on in the game. He whips out his cell phone and tries to call Wade. Wade answers on the field, but he can't hear what Coach is saying, and so hangs up the phone and calls the play. It's a good one, we gather from Slammin' Sammy expositing that Wade's "inspired play calling" has put the Panthers deep in Bison territory. Another snap, but a sack this time. Coach resigns himself to watching, resigns himself to being totally out of the driver's seat now. The clock is ticking down, but J.D. gets the ball into Riggins' arms, and Riggins powers through yard after yard for the touchdown, Panthers Win! Panthers Win! Coach, back in the high school tavern, asks the bartender if he's got any scotch back there. He gets his pour and clinks glasses with some other dude in there (who is not a Bison fan? confused), and watches the TV coverage of Wade getting cheered, Slammin' Sammy going a bit overboard in telegraphing, er I mean, praising Wade for those three play calls he just made.

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Friday Night Lights

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