Gilmore Girls
How Many Kropogs To Cape Cod?

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"My Boyfriend's a Kleptomaniac! Cute!"

Rory tells Lorelai that Emily and Richard are "very taken" with Richie's lapels. "They look fine to me," says Lorelai. "You'll have to excuse Lorelai, [Richie]," says Emily, happy to have another opportunity to put her daughter down. "It takes a certain eye to be aware of this type of thing." Richard comes over with Rory and Richie's drinks, and walks off to prepare Lorelai's. There is some more discussion over whether Lorelai has a vodka or a gin martini, and Emily just can't let this go. Lorelai changes the subject and asks Richie where he lives on campus. He says his dorm is about "ninety kropogs" away from Rory's, and Richard lets out a huff of delight at hearing someone use such a Yale-specific unit of measurement. A kropog, Richie explains to clueless outcast Lorelai, is based on the height of a kid named "Kropog." Elis on the forums say that this was made up for the show, and based on the MIT unit of measurement named after a kid named Smoot, which no one at MIT even uses except to measure the length of the Harvard Bridge. So it's kind of weird that Richie would just drop it into a regular conversation like that.

With all this kropog talk, Richard forgot to get Lorelai's martini. Emily volunteers to get it. I wouldn't put it past her to drop an Ex-Lax in there, just to embarrass Lorelai even more. Rory requests that the topic of conversation be altered to something non-Yale, so that everyone may take part in it. "Nonsense!" squeals Emily. "There's nothing better to talk about than Yale!" She hands Lorelai her martini, and it's got an onion in it. Lorelai says she requested an olive. Emily says she thought Lorelai said onion. If I were Lorelai, at this point I'd just shut up and start drinking the alcohol.

Cut to sometime later; now tennis is the topic of conversation. Lorelai sits on the couch, silent, her empty martini glass in her hand. Richie gives Emily racquet advice and says he'd be happy to set her up with a guy who makes the ceramic racquets that Pete Sampras swears by. Emily is delighted. Beatrice comes in and announces that dinner is ready. Lorelai asks if booze will be served at dinner, since she hasn't gotten a "kropog of gin" since her initial martini. "A kropog is a unit of distance, Lorelai, not volume," says Richard, looking all annoyed that Lorelai would make such a stupid mistake. Emily snaps that there will be wine with dinner, just like there always is: "Honestly! You're acting as if you've never been here!" Well, Emily, you acted like Lorelai had never been there first, with your sidecar crap.

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Gilmore Girls

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