Gilmore Girls
Let Me Hear Your Balalaikas Ringing Out

Episode Report Card
Al Lowe: B+ | 2 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
Is That A Balalaika In Your Pocket...

The game starts, and Luke and Lorelai begin to notice that these sweet little girls are, uh, not so sweet on the field. Elbows are thrown, shins are kicked, and Lorelai finally has to ask, "Who is their coach, Sam Peckinpah?" Heee. I thought this whole thing was going to be a set-up about how the girls just wanted to play, but the parents were all overaggressive and crazy but, no. It's the girls who are kicking ass, and I love it.

Luke and Lorelai are disturbed and can barely watch the carnage. They run to the truck after the game, speechless. "It was Scarface on the soccer field!" Lorelai says. They shiver as they remember the blood on the jerseys, and duck down to avoid seeing one of the girls. "Killers!" Lorelai says. "Killers, all!" She says she doesn't want to go to another game. Luke agrees, and they speed away.

Later that night, Jess has arrived at the Big House to go out to dinner with Rory. They talk about where to go, and Rory doesn't have any suggestions. His only requirement is that they not go somewhere with food in the title. "'Olive'...'Chili'...'Soup,'" he explains. "No 'Gardens,' no 'Plantations.'" ["Mmmm, Souplantation. I could go for a fifty-foot salad bar right now. Shut up, Jess." -- Wing Chun] Jess suggests that they try the college district to find "something funky." They're about to make their escape when none other than Logan drives up. Ugh. The dick-measuring starts immediately. Rory makes the polite introductions, even indicating that Logan is her boyfriend, and the boys stare in manly silence at one another. Well, I mean, as manly as Logan can be with his Backstreet highlights, and all. Rory tries her old mainstay -- babbling -- to cover the awkwardness, but it doesn't work. Jess looks on calmly as Logan postures with every ounce of his ego, even going so far as to invite himself out with them and leading Rory to his car, suggesting that Jess follow, alone. Ooooh, snap. Rory looks very uncomfortable and my Grinch heart grows three sizes on Jess's behalf. I don't care if the guy mugged Miss Patty in the town square and set the gazebo on fire in a past season. Compared to Logan, I love him.

Lorelai arrives at home to find her shoes lined up down the hallway, leading to Paul Anka, who is laid out in front of Rory's room. She bends to comfort him, wondering what in the world is going on with this shoe thing.

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Gilmore Girls

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