Gilmore Girls
Run Away, Little Boy

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Philllipppe, CuteDean, Troilus, Cressida

Rory walks over to Paris's group. Louisa points out that Philllipppe is back from suspension. So that's what the kids are calling the Creek these days. Rory asks if Philllipppe was suspended. Paris says, "Oh, like you hadn't noticed he'd been gone?" Fraulein says that Philllipppe took apart a teacher's car and put it back together in the school hallway. Man, Rory really doesn't participate in school if she hadn't even heard that. Louisa says that Philllipppe didn't act alone, and that his new best friends Duncan and Bowman were there. Fraulein adds that they paid mechanics to do the actual work. Paris notes that anyone who hangs out with "Butch Cassidy and the Sundunce kid" deserves any punishment he gets. Fraulein says that Philllipppe and his new friends are inseparable this semester. Louisa says that they're practically dressing the same. Was that a joke about the dress code? She didn't deliver it like one.

Lorelai calls one of her aunts, and has to explain who she is, so we know this isn't a close aunt. She checks a name off of her list as she listens to her aunt talk. "Um, yeah, that's right. Wow, you don't hear the word 'wedlock' much anymore." Rory walks in and announces that she's home. Lorelai continues to listen to her aunt on the phone and asks if the Bible mentioned her by name. She explains that she was kidding and that she's pretty sure she didn't send Lorelai the ice-cream maker. She asks for Aunt Clarissa's phone number, but it turns out Aunt Clarissa is a heathen too, so no dice. Lorelai promises to call in the next twenty years, and hangs up. Rory sits beside Lorelai on the couch and asks if there was any luck. Lorelai says she's still got the Pennsylvania Gilmores to try. Rory tells Lorelai about Act V with Paris and the Non-Puffs. Lorelai asks what part Rory is playing. Rory says that Paris is still mulling over the screen tests, and that she'll find out tomorrow. Rory had to go through twenty-four takes. Lorelai wishes for a copy to sell on the internet, and walks back into the kitchen as Rory yells that she told Paris that Lorelai would make all of the costumes. I can't believe Rory did that, by the way. Neither can Lorelai, who walks back in, eating a tub of Cool Whip. Rory tells Lorelai she needs a résumé, referrals, and samples of her current work. "And my bare butt to kiss," Lorelai says. Rory: "If you think that will set you apart from the other applicants, yes." Rory comments that she can't believe there's someone in their family named "Bunny." Lorelai tells Rory to cross Bunny off the list as she draws her finger across her throat. "Poor Bunny," Rory moans. The phone rings. It's Henry. Rory puts him on hold and calls Lane. Lorelai says she's headed for class, but there's "pizza slash Luke's money" on the table. Doesn't Lorelai have class on Wednesday afternoons?

Yay, MamaLane's back! MamaLane informs Rory that Lane is studying and can't talk. Lane runs down the stairs and asks if the phone is for her. She says she needed to talk to Rory. MamaLane asks if Lane finished her homework. "You do your math?" Lane: "Yes." MamaLane: "History?" Lane: "Yes." MamaLane: "Biology?" Lane: "No." MamaLane: "Why?" Lane: "Well, I'm not taking biology." MamaLane: "Why?" Lane: "I took it last year." MamaLane: "And that's it? One year and you know all there is to know? Tomorrow we look into private school." I love MamaLane so much. She got a haircut. It's pretty. Lane begs to use the phone, and MamaLane gives it to her with a five-minute timer. Rory says hi and clicks Henry on the line. Rory puts the phone down as Lane talks to Henry, but calls him Rory. It's like a nickname, almost. Lorelai tells Rory that she's really gone this time, and asks Rory to make some of the calls for her. Um, no! It's not your daughter's job to inform people that the wedding has been cancelled. Ew. Rory asks if Lorelai's going too far with this. She tried to find who sent the machine, but she can't. "It's called closure, hon," Lorelai says. "Okay? I need it." Then close the damn book yourself, Lorelai, and don't make your daughter call up people to say that Daddy's not going to be Daddy and there won't be any ice cream made in the house, either. Rory picks up the phone to call Uncle Randolph, and apologizes to Lane and Henry for interrupting them. Lorelai tells Rory not to wait too long, because Uncle Randolph was Bunny's older brother.

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