Episode Report Card
LTG: D- | 28 USERS: A+
Gleekasaurus Wrecks
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Some episodes of this show just make me happy. Others make me angry. Occasionally, an episode (say, a certain drug-fueled holiday extravaganza) leaves me baffled. But this episode just bored me, from beginning to end. I mean, if I'm so bored by the episode that even Puck in his underwear can't pique my interest, you've got a problem.

We start with a Rachel voice-over. She's just so sad about screwing up her Fake New York Theater School audition that she's decided her dreams are dead. She just goes on like this forever -- her dreams are dead, the only thing in her life she has to look forward to now is her wedding to Finn and Nationals, she'll never be famous, etc. As she drones on (and on and on), we see her taking down her dream vision board, walking down the school hallway as though she's a nobody and looking at prom dresses. That last one is because she's decided that this one prom will have to stand in for every red carpet she'll never walk down because she choked during her audition. The only interesting thing about this monologue is that, for some completely inexplicable reason, we spend several seconds seeing Rachel dressed like classic Barbra, in leopard-print coat and matching pillbox hat, sitting in the auditorium. Because that's exactly the kind of thing you do if, as Rachel is trying to convince us (and herself), you're perfectly fine with the fact that your dream of stardom is over. Of course, her attempt to convince herself that she's not a loser takes a nose dive when she catches Becky practicing her prom queen wave and Becky tells her to beat it so she won't catch Rachel's failure. Title card.

Maharishi's Lair. Figgins is reminding Brit-Brit (whom he addresses as "sexy teen trollop") that she's student body president and is supposed to be planning for prom. Apparently, even though she's getting F's in every one of her classes, Figgins thinks that having "student body president" on her record will help her get into college. She can't possibly be graduating, can she? Anyway, she's got it covered, because she's already been accepted by Purdue. By which she means the poultry processing plant, not the institution of higher learning.

Oh, and now here's Brit meeting the prom committee for the very first time. It's staffed by three never-before-seen, never-to-be-seen-again students. Let's see, Brit's really stupid, so I think we can guess that the following things will happen in this scene: she'll forget their names; she'll fail to grasp the concept of metaphor; she'll be extra rude to them; she'll ditch all their work and come up with something of her own; she'll call them bullies, even though she's been about ten times ruder to them than they are to her; and she'll mistake one of them for a less popular glee club member. And yes, all of those things happen. What we couldn't necessarily predict was that Brit would decide the theme for prom should be "Dinosaurs." Oy, this show.

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