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The Replacements
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously, on Glee, Kurt followed Meathead Karofsky into the locker room to berate him for his constant bullying and ended up getting a kiss instead of a pummeling. A wise friend told me she feared that episode made it seem like confronting a bully, especially a sexually-confused one, was a safe thing to do. So, to any kids reading this who are being bullied, I say this -- you absolutely do not deserve to be treated that way. You need to do whatever you can to keep yourself safe and get away from the people who are bullying. If you can, find an adult in your life you can speak with -- parents, teachers, counselors, friends' parents. If the adults in your life are the bullies, find some other adults who will protect you or who will at least talk to you and help you think of ways to keep yourself safe. You'll find adults like that at the Trevor Project (866-488-7386) and at local community groups. And if you absolutely have to, find some other people you can live with (uncles, aunts, grandparents, family friends) and get away from your school (or your home) and the bullies who are there. But don't follow the ringleader bully into an empty locker room to confront him. Because while some people may bully others because of peer pressure or because they're insecure about their own status in some tribal hierarchy, the ones who are totally obsessed with your sexual orientation are really screwed up in one way or another. And they are much less likely to kiss you than they are to beat the crap out of you.

Anyway, on to this episode. When someone mentions Ryan Murphy and Gwyneth Paltrow in the same sentence (which happens all the time), my mind automatically drifts back to former TWoP recapper Gustave. After I hunted him down and worked my way through his three personal assistants, he graciously agreed to watch this episode with me in his fabulous Tribeca loft while we sipped martinis. I'll share some of his comments at appropriate points in the episode.

A bevy of cheerless Cheerios carry an enormous trophy down the hall like a battering ram. Has Sue finally allied herself with Sauron? Will enters the school and greets Sue. She stops him to point out his error: "It's Principal Sue." Will is as gobsmacked as you might think, and he wants to know what happened to Figgins. Sue: "A particularly virulent strain of monkey flu has arrived in Ohio from Borneo, where it had been festering in a small clutch of loud, bisexual primates, not unlike your very Glee Club." Will asks how Figgins caught the monkey pox, and we smear sideways...

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