Happy Endings

Episode Report Card
Sara Brady: D | 14 USERS: B+
Parrot Sketch Not Included

Paige de-sluts herself while whining about lying to Briggs all the time. Mike points out that Briggs always has reasonable answers for their questions, and that it's important not to listen to what he says but to pay attention to what he does. In another room, Briggs rants to Jakes about Mike's investigation. He tells Jakes to grab Mike first tomorrow when the tac team shows up (since Jakes has to arrest Briggs and Mike to maintain their covers with Clayton). If Jakes can get him ten extra seconds, he can destroy the tape. Jakes is reluctant; you can tell he's booking that ticket to Bora Bora in his head. I'm sure they have illegal parrots in the South Pacific.

Clayton is late and Mike is jittery. In their car, Jakes explains to Paige how he's going to arrest Mike and Briggs. Paige needles him for taking the easy duty (since Briggs and Mike probably won't shoot him) and further pokes at him for not being an active part of the house. "Just because I keep to myself doesn't make me an asshole," he says. In this crowd, I think it's a sign of wisdom and good taste, actually.

Clayton pulls up in a red car rather than the black Crown Vic Mike and Briggs were expecting. They pry out of him that the Crown Vic is the switch-out car for after the robbery.

Charlie and Cortez meet again for drinks. At this point I'm pretty sure she's going to sleep with him before he chops her face off. She asks for his help going undercover with Quinn, and insists that it'll be easy to get Quinn to roll on Odin. Just then, Johnny plops down between them, and Charlie's instantly outraged, asking if Johnny followed her. You'd think a fed would be better at losing a tail—or, you know, noticing she has one. Charlie introduces Cortez and Johnny says he doesn't trust federales. Johnny and Charlie argue about what she's doing and Cortez is all, can I please just cut off one of your ears? Or maybe a fingertip? I'm getting anxious here. He insists he's been a clean cop for twelve years and is on Charlie's side. Johnny acquiesces.

Clayton, Mike, and Briggs pull up in front of a Korean massage parlor. So they're going to rob some hardworking working girls, as it's an all-cash business. Clayton passes a sawed-off shotgun to Briggs and reminds them not to forget to rob the johns. Inside, Briggs very politely interrupts some knickers-only massages (this is still basic cable, after all) and asks for wallets. Clayton's other associate clears out the safe and heads out, but as Briggs is reminding everyone not to call the cops, Mike handcuffs him to a bookshelf.

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