Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B- | Grade It Now!
Ice To See You

At "Building 26," which I guess is Mutants Are Bad Central, Danko has pictures of many Heroes up on a bulletin board and is telling his team that their accounts are frozen, and their program has access to traffic-cam feeds from all fifty states. "The Patriot Act gives us a lot of leeway here." That's one word for it. Someone asks about Claire, and is bummed to hear that their arrangement is such that they still can't touch her. Danko slags Nathan off to the group, which is a mistake, because he's quietly entered the room. He informs the group that he knows they want revenge on Claire and others, because when you capture and detain people like animals you should totally begrudge them resistance, but then tells them that many of the people on the board aren't dangerous -- just scared. But just when you think Nathan might be shifting positions here (and isn't he overdue already?) he says that since they know they're being hunted, they're going to be harder to find, so he put in a request to the White House that morning to double their funding. He exhorts the group to know the targets, track them down, and bring them in alive, and we see a picture of Sylar on someone's monitor. If anyone has trouble committing those eyebrows to memory, he should really look for another line of work.

Speaking of whom, The Gay Station-Wagon Road Trip is continuing apace, and Sylar's losing patience as his overcaffeinated Padawan learner (oh God, is that why they named him "Luke"?) won't shut up about diners and pie and whatever, saying they're not stopping. When Luke still won't divulge the whereabouts of Sylar's dad beyond "West," however, he pulls the car over. Kids don't learn from that kind of about-face, Sylar. After Luke lies a couple times about the dad's exact location, Sylar grabs him by the throat and says he slices people's heads open, and Luke's smile as he breathes that Sylar is a serial killer heads straight to the erotic asphyxiation place without passing Go. I'm sorry (like, really, really sorry) but it's true. Sylar's a little offended at the characterization, but I'm sure that's because he's been telling guys he's not into labels for years. He asks why he shouldn't slice Luke's head open, but Luke knows the game here and says if he does, Sylar will never find his dad. Sylar sits petulantly for a moment and then tries to regain some face by saying this isn't a road trip. Not only is it a road trip, it's going to turn out gayer than The Living End, but whatever you need to tell yourself, dude. "Born To Be Wild" kicks up, but in a nice twist, after they pass under a crossing highway, we pan up to a traffic camera as the music turns ominous...

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