One Giant Leap

Episode Report Card
Erin: C+ | Grade It Now!
Talk about wearing your heart on your sleeve...
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously on Heroes: That announcer guy stopped taking his antibiotics and his strep throat got worse and his voice got more annoying, if that's even POSSIBLE, and a bunch of regular Joes discovered that they had special powers, and it would seem that they, and a bunch of other Heroes, are supposed to save New York from a nuclear bomb. In light of recent events, that storyline doesn't seem all that far-fetched, now does it?

We begin the episode, as always, with the title card, which tells us that we're at Chapter Three: One Giant Leap. The camera slips up and over the side of the cherry-red convertible and shows us a sleeping Micah. Niki's in the desert, digging an incredibly shallow grave for the two dead thugs. Again, Suresh gives us his expository voice-over: "When evolution selects its agents, it does so at a cost. It makes demands in exchange for its singularity, and you may be asked to do something against your very nature." Niki hits something with her shovel and we see her discover the same skull she discovered before. How long has she been digging in the same damn spot? The Angel of Continuity is clearly on her smoke break.

Niki comes across a skeletal hand with a big-ass silver ring on one of its fingers. She removes it and sees that it's a skull ring. Suresh: "Suddenly, the change in your life that should have been wonderful, comes as a betrayal." Niki runs to the car to get the bodies, even though the "grave" that she's dug wouldn't fit a flattened ferret. Suresh: "It may seem cruel, but the goal is nothing short of self-preservation. Survival." I have no idea what he's talking about half the goddamn time. And I'm not even sure it's Suresh Junior; it might be Papa Suresh. I don't know. He sounds like fucking Confucius. Niki opens the trunk and stares at the bodies.

We head to another trunk, this time in Odessa, Texas. Bad Glasses Man is pulling a bear in a football uniform out by the noose he was apparently hung by. That is the most awkward sentence I've ever written. And I should probably note that the bear is a fake. Claire made it for the celebratory bonfire later that night. As she and her creepy father walk toward the school, Claire makes eyes at the jockstrap from the other day. BGM comments on this. Claire's all, I don't like him! Giggle giggle! BGM's all, you so totally DO like him! And I'm going to kill him later! The snotty cheertator from the last episode simpers up and fakely compliments BGM on his nerd-o-riffic glasses. He thanks her and mentions her heroine status as the girl who saved the guy from the train wreck. She's all, oh, gee! Thanks so much! You heard about that? Claire's all, uh, dumb-ass? You only told everyone to TiVo the damn broadcast. Also? You're about thirty-two and far too old to be on the cheerleading team. Now go get me something flammable so I can set my hair on fire.

Jackie the Snotty Cheertator says that her fake heroism is going to be the cornerstone of her campaign for class president. She finally, thankfully, leaves and Claire gives her an awesomely snotty, "Tee hee!" as she goes. Heh. Claire heads to her locker, but not before BGM demands a kiss on the cheek. Ew. Uncle Inappropriate Touching, much? He calls after to her to be careful, and Claire makes a mental note to coat herself in Clorox as soon as possible.

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