Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: B+ | Grade It Now!
John 3:16

When my oldest son was tiny, we took him to the beach, and before our feet hit the sand, he pointed out to sea and said, "Mommy, whassat?" I told him it was the ocean, and he said, "The ocean. Whassat?" Not sure how else to explain an ocean to a one year old, I said, "That's a big water." Mesmerized and still pointing, he said, "Yeah. Das a biiigggg water." And every time we took him to the beach that summer, he'd point out to sea and say, "Das a biiigggg water, Mommy." Or "Daddy," or "Nana," or "Grampy," but I'm telling the story, so I'm featuring myself. Anyhow, Hurley is floundering and panicking, but is he in a biiigggg water? Not so much, no. I mean, I think I'm exaggerating by calling it a lake, but pond doesn't seem right somehow, and pool can be confusing. So... Jack drags him for about three seconds before they can stand. Oops, embarrassing. Not to mention, Hurley can swim y'all. Remember his cannonball into the ocean? While I'm nitpicking, the guys notice an unconscious Kate lying with her head on a rather large rock. Talk about your Jacob's pillow -- and yet, she's not bleeding. I mean -- not even a scratch. Jack flips her over -- listens to her... throat (what's up with that), and uses all his medical knowledge to revive her by saying stuff like, "Kate, can you hear me?" Good thing she has a doctor handy.

Kate comes to, and says, "Jack," which is promising, since that's who she's looking at. He asks if she's okay, but she has a question of her own. "Are we..." She looks around. Jack says, "Yeah, we're back." Kate wants to know what happened, but Jack can only shake his head, and we fade to black.

A title card reads: "46 Hours Earlier" and we fade in on Mrs. Hawking lighting candles at the church, beneath the Caravaggio painting (maybe Dharma jumped back in time and swiped an original), "The Incredulity of Saint Thomas." Didn't I recap this scene last week? It's not plagiarism if you copy yourself, right? Ben walks into the church, followed by Sun, Jack, and then Des. Eloise looks them over then says, "I thought I said all of them." Desmond's just shutting the door, and when he turns to see Eloise Hawking, his eyes fall out of his head and roll across the floor. Ben says, "This is all I could get on short notice." Hawking says, "I guess it will have to do for now." The scene differs slightly from last week's, much like Sun's scene in her car at the Marina differed from week to week. With an ordinary show, I'd just assume they were either being artful or less careful. With Lost I keep thinking about time travel and wondering if things are slightly different to show me that all of this has happened before. All this will happen again. Eloise's gaze meets Jack's, then she adds, "All right. Let's get started." She leads them through the sanctuary to a door. The sign on it reads: "CAUTION High Voltage. Do not enter this enclosure." So they enter. Desmond plays caboose as they descend the spiral staircase and travel through the basement to the top seekrit island-locating lab. Inside, Foucault's Pendulum swings back and forth, etching lines on the floor beneath, and computers stutter and hum. The gang looks around at the blackboard full of equations and all the crazy equipment until Jack asks, "What is this place?" Eloise, who seems to relish the role of tour guide/Expositrix General, says, "The Dharma Initiative called this the Lamp Post," because we're not done with C.S. Lewis, dears. As the pendulum swings, Eloise does her best Vanna White and says, "This is how they found the island," and the music carries us upward and outward (or for the Lewis geeks, further up and further in) and to a commercial.

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