Deus Ex Machina

Episode Report Card
Daniel: B+ | Grade It Now!
Immaculate misconception

So Locke is explaining to Boone about the vision he saw after asking the island for a sign, but he sticks to the details about just the plane and doesn't say anything about bloody Boone. "I know where to go now," he says. Boone says, "Go for what?" "To find what we need to open this bastard up," says Locke. But even Boone has had enough of Locke's crazy jungle-man routine, so he asks, "Have you been using that wacky paste stuff that made me see my sister die?" he says, completely nonchalant about the whole thing, with that nonsensical completely contrived sentence. I think this is like one of those moments on 24 or Alias with plotlines that span several episodes, and a writer gets a dig in at another writer for some detail that wasn't explained properly or outright made no sense on another episode. Because yeah, that "wacky paste stuff" was really good times for you, Boone. He expresses a little more skepticism about Locke's signs and visions and symbols, so Locke interrupts him to ask who Theresa is. Boone's look goes hard. Locke says tells Boone that in his vision, he was repeating, "Theresa falls up the stairs, Theresa falls down the stairs." Boone asks how Locke would know about that. Locke's all, "See? My point!" and tells Boone that they're supposed to go to this place where he saw the plane go down, and asks Boone to come with him.

Mercutio and Jin are working on the raft together, as Jack makes his rounds, with that backpack that makes him look like he's on his way to school. He's really impressed with the progress they're making. Mercutio explains that they learned a few things while building the first raft, so there's not so much trial and error. "Now it's just...trial," he says, glancing Jin's way. To illustrate his point, Jin starts talking at him, and Mercutio's all, "yeah, man, I know, 'now,' 'now,'" and Jack's impressed that Mercutio seems to be picking up a little Korean. Mercutio says he's pretty sure he knows Korean for "faster" and "idiot." Does he also know Korean for "pointless scene" and "dropped storylines"?

Nearby, Sawyer is all drama queen putting a cold compress over his eyes and leaning against a tree, so Jack strolls over to ask about Sawyer's head, and Sawyer all snottily notes that Kate now has Jack making house calls. He takes off the cloth and squints at Jack, who notices that Sawyer also seems to be sensitive to light. "I'm sensitive to you," begins Sawyer, and speaking of sensitive, crybaby Jack's all, "Forget this," and stomps away. Sawyer, of course, holds him up a sec to ask if sensitivity to light is a bad thing. Depends, says Jack, on what's causing the headaches. "It's not like it's a brain tumour or something," says Sawyer, and Jack's all, hey, who said anything about a tumour? Sawyer scowls some more, and Jack turns to leave, like I'd love to see Jack back in the real world with difficult patients, stomping out of examination rooms all the time when patients have a difficult time articulating their problems, and Sawyer says his uncle died of a brain tumour. "That run in the family?" he asks. What type of tumour was it, Jack wants to know. "The type that kills you," says Sawyer all snotty, and normally I have no patience for the HoYay discussions on this site, as there's not a single scene involving men that doesn't have people squealing "HoYay!" at it, like how much more annoying would I be if every scene that involved Kate and Sun and Shannon and Claire prompted me to start talking about how badly they want each other and how they should just start making out, but I'm starting to get a sense that Jack and Sawyer are secretly boyfriends and they hide it under a thick veneer of hostility. Jack asks if Sawyer is smelling any phantom scents, because tumours will do that, but Sawyer says it's just headaches, so Jack figures Sawyer's fine. Jack offers to do a few tests on Sawyer, and Sawyer declines, even though it "sounds like fun," because his "insurance ran out" and Jack laughs and repeats the line, and they both say "IN-surance" instead of "in-SUR-ance," and they manage to end this scene without making out. Jack walks away.

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