Raised By Another

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I Can See How Ugly She'll Be When She's Old (The Psychic's Lament)
Flashback. Claire's walking down a Sydney street with a friend, telling her that Thomas Kinkade finished cleaning out his loft and she's moving in soon. They're heading to an appointment with a psychic, one which Claire feels a little nervous about, but her friend tells her it'll be fun.

The psychic, who looks like an evil Colm Meaney, takes Claire's hands and, after a long pause during which he receives information from the bulge in his back, asks Claire when she found out about the baby. Awkward! Claire looks at her friend, who shrugs an eloquent I-didn't-tell-the-psychic-about-your-baby shrug. "Two days ago," Claire says. Her friend interrupts the further silence to note that Claire hasn't told her mother yet, but Claire shushes her. E. Colm Meaney squinches his not-insubstantial forehead and looks aghast. "What is it?" Claire asks, and is put out when a frightened E. Colm tells her he can't go through with the reading. "You were gonna say something," Claire protests, but E. Colm tells her to leave, now. "What a freak," Claire's friend says as they walk out, but Claire looks scared.

The Caves I Can't Think of a Good Name For. Claire sleeps, wearing a black tank top. There's a weird little jump cut and Claire is suddenly attacked by someone who clamps a hand over her mouth and pulls up her (white) shirt to reveal her pregnant belly. A big fucking knife flashes in the foreground.

Commercials. To people like me who grew up in Wisconsin, the Buick LaCrosse is a hilarious name for a car. What's so ritzy and elegant, or, as the closed captioning claims, "shic," about the city of La Crosse that made Buick want to name a car after it? This does, however, remind me of one of the many, many events in my childhood that made my family believe I was going to end up gay -- when, in the 1987 Whitefish Bay School District Spelling Bee, I finished in second place because I confidently spelled sheik "chic."

Those Same Caves, Still Frustratingly Unnamed. Claire's screamin' again, and Charlie tells Jack that someone attacked her and then ran away. Charlie and Hurley go off to see if they can find whoever did it; Ethan gets some water; Jack and Mercutio sit Claire down and tries to settle her. A frantic Claire says that someone -- she couldn't see who -- stabbed her with some kind of needle. Jack and Mercutio look skeptical, what with her total lack of needle wounds and all.

Hurley and Jack walk through the jungle a bit later. Hurley points out that his search for whoever attacked Claire is hampered by the fact that they have no master list of who's living where on the island. "We don't even know each other!" he says. "My name isn't Hurley. It's Hugo Reyes. Hurley's just a nickname I have, all right? Why? I'm not telling." Heh. "The point is, we got to find out who everyone is." Jack asks if Hugo really wants to start a census, and Hugo says, basically, yeah: "It seems like someone's getting punched or stabbed or something every single day here." He thinks it's time to lay down the law.

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