Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: B+ | Grade It Now!
You Don't Know Jack

Sideways: Dr. Jack Shephard and his son David enter the very same building where we last saw Claire and Desmond, but don't call Ripley's just yet. Jack's on the phone with David's Mystery Mom, and when he promises to have him home around 5:00 PM, David shakes him off. Jack smiles and tells Mystery Mom that they'll probably grab a bite to eat, after, so maybe it'll be more like 7:00. Then Jack prepares David for their meeting. They're off to hear the reading of Christian's will. Jack knows it's not the must fun outing ever, but says it won't take too long, and tells his boy that it's okay to be sad. David: "I'm sad for you, Dad." What a love. He's so Jack's Mini-Me, isn't he?

They enter the Sweetzer and Verdansky Law Firm. Point of interest: Desmond was going to meet Penny at a coffee shop on the corner of Melrose and Sweetzer. The Shephard men are greeted by Ilana who leads them to the conference room, chirping, "I've got a surprise for you. Do you believe in fate?" You can start dialing Ripley's, now. By the way, it's weird -- insensitive -- that Ilana is so chipper about this, right? I mean obviously, she was looking for Claire Littleton, because as we learned in this season's Jack-centric, Claire's in Christian's will. Ilana must know, by now, that Claire is Jack's half-sister, so shouldn't she be a bit more delicate -- a bit less gleeful? Jack is here, with his young son, for the reading of his father's will. This is (ostensibly), already a sad thing. Now he's about to find about that his late dad fathered a child on the other side of the world. Davy-wavy's about to find out that Grandpa Christian was a ho. Sure, eventually, having Claire in their lives (would, could) be a great thing, but it's going to hit hard, right in the gut, isn't it? Anyways...

Ilana makes the introductions. Jack is surprised that Ilana was able to find the mysterious Claire Littleton. Ilana says, "Actually, she found us." Actually, actually, your secret special snowflake arranged the whole thing, brothah. Jack isn't sure what to say. "Uh. You were in my father's will. Do you mind if I ask you how you knew him?" Claire: "I... he was my father too." Jack's all: "..." Before he can put on his gracious face, his phone rings. As he takes the call, he raises his free hand to his forehead, to keep his frontal lobe from busting out. Jack on the phone: "Yeah, this is Dr. Shephard..." His voice is strangled into a funny little laugh-cry. "No, no it's not a very good time... Yes, they can go ahead and prep him. I'm 20 minutes away." Once he's off the phone, he offers his apologies. There's been a Locke an emergency at the hospital and they'll have to reschedule. Wow, Jack. That must be the best timed emergency ever, at least from your Sideways point of view.

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