The Long Con

Episode Report Card
Daniel: B | Grade It Now!
Power play
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!
Locke opens the door to the hatch-hole armoury, and Jack walks in with his case full o' guns, and Locke asks if that's all of them, and Jack says all six are there, plus a box of ammo. Locke notes it's nice that they don't have to worry about running out any time soon (because the guns will be locked out of Ana-Lucia's reach?). Then he says he's "grateful" Jack decided to store the guns there. Because the guns belong to Jack and all.

Jack glances up and sees the confiscated Virgin Junkie statues on the shelf. Locke notices him looking and says he had to confiscate them from Charlie. "His heroin stash. I figured it might have therapeutic value, if it ever came to that," he says. Jack asks if he was just going to leave them in the statues. Turns out Locke wasn't really interested in smashing open the statues, but Jack can, if he wants to. Or maybe there was a Danish cartoonist on Flight 815 who can do it.

Locke starts to leave, and Jack asks him for the combination. Locke hesitates, then launches into one of his sanctimonious soliloquies about how he's going to give Jack the benefit of the doubt (big of him) and assume he's asking for the combo in case Locke is ever incapacitated, and not because he doesn't trust Locke. "That it would be irresponsible for just one of us to have access to this room, rather than this being an issue of trust." Gotta say that it doesn't sound like Jack's the one with the trust issues, here, Locke. Jack just dryly notes that there are "a lot of cliffs" on this island. Niiiiiiice dig at Locke about Boone. Point for Jack! Locke stares at him for a moment, before nodding and then suggesting that they should agree to consult the other before opening the door. Jack readily agrees, as he's taking the key to the case from around his neck. "Right seven, left thirty-three, right eighteen," says Locke, and asks if Jack needs to write it down, and Jack all smug says that he's got it, like they have to turn even this into a dick-measuring thing. Jack starts to leave, but Locke stops him: "And Jack, you may want to consider locking the medicine in here too." Jack wants to know why he'd need to do that.

As if to answer, we cut to Sawyer, who's shirtless, strolling out of the surf and razzing Charlie, who's setting up a tent on the beach: "Well, well. Look who had to relocate from the suburbs!" He blathers on about how it's just like a woman: she keeps the house, while Charlie gets the crappy apartment. You know, the kind of garbage that's completely unacceptable from men with worse hair and softer stomachs. Charlie refuses to take his bait, even as Sawyer mockingly praises Charlie for sinking to a new low (meaning that he's hated even worse than Sawyer is now) with the baby-stealing and almost baby-drowning. "You even made Locke take a swing at you! Hell, that's like getting Gandhi to beat his kids." And then I had to stop working on the recap and go lie down for several hours because Locke was compared to Gandhi. Remember that time "Gandhi" conked Sayid on the head? Or was that Locke?

Charlie just calmly asks Sawyer if he shouldn't be more concerned about Jack ransacking his tent. Sawyer looks down the beach, and sure enough…

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