Whatever the Case May Be

Episode Report Card
Daniel: C- | Grade It Now!
Pulp friction
Man, I don't know about you guys, but I am psyched! It's been so long since Lost has been on, and it's completely my favourite show on television. Other than 24, and The Sopranos. Oh, and The Wire. And Alias, and Curb Your Enthusiasm. But other than -- oh, and Arrested Development.

But other than that, wooooo-hoooo! Lost is back, and -- okay, I'd also trade Jack and Kate and Sawyer and everyone else for, like, one period between the Oilers and the Stars (which reminds me: a shout-out's due to WynterWolf, with an honourable mention to Mister Z).

But other than that long list of shows, and sporting-related events, and news, Lost is completely my favourite thing to watch. And it's been torture, waiting to find out what's up now that we know there are other people on the island, and Claire's yummy-future-mumminess has been kidnapped. And we open on a long, slow pan to Kate, high up in a tree. She's probably found where the other castaways are, and is scouting out their camp or someth-- no, she appears to be gathering berries. Okay, that's fine. She's probably gathering sustenance for the cast of regulars, who are down below, in preparation for their Mad Max-like assault on the enemy compound, and we'll see them just as soon as she climbs down, which she's doing now.

Huh. There's no one there. At least, we think there's no one else there, at least until we hear a twig snap, which is a bit of a relief, since if you hear a twig snap, that means it's not the silent terror of a ninja that is stalking you (or at least not only the silent terror of a ninja). Kate hears it, looks around, then keeps walking. And she hears another twig snap. And if you were wondering might be the dumbest thing a person could possibly do in this situation, it's entirely likely that the answer is "picking up a rock and throwing it in the general direction of the noise," which is what Kate does here.

Improbably, she hits the source of the noise, which is Sawyer. Unfortunately, she hits him not in the mouth, but in the knee, so he immediately starts beaking off about it. For a guy who stood up to an Iraqi army torturer, he doesn't take well to getting a rock to the leg. They playfully bicker a bit, with Kate asking if he's stalking her, and him replying that he's protecting her, and she says, "From what, Southern perverts?" Oh, har har, considering that there is a very long list of quite legitimate answers to that question, including, but not limited to, wild boars, polar bears, Lostzilla, getting bonked in the head by an unknown assailant, and crazy island kidnappers, so maybe the crash survivors want to consider implementing the buddy system.

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