First Thing We Do, Let’s Kill All The Lawyers

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B- | 155 USERS: B+
Not Better, Not Better You Bet

Marcia Gay Harden doesn't like Maggie's new look and thinks it will ruin her credibility as a character witness. As opposed to the fact that she's Maggie and acts like Maggie which, frankly, is enough. Will says that if "what happened to" Maggie happened to Marcia Gay Harden, "You'd kill yourself for the rest of your life" and "sit in a room and cry forever." There's no way he could be saying those lines seriously, so this must all be a joke and Maggie didn't go out and have a worldly life-changing experience and probably just got her hair stuck in the garbage disposal while also trying to see if the garbage disposal would work as blender and mix up a batch of Kool-Aid.

Marcia Gay Harden tires of Will's snarkiness and tells him that if she loses this case then everyone who had anything to do with this mysterious "Genoa" will never work again. Especially not Will. Also, bullshit. Piers Morgan published fake photos of the military abusing Iraqis on the front of the English tabloid he ran and he now has his own primetime show on CNN.

But let us flashback to two weeks after the season finale. An innocent time, when Maggie's hair was like golden straw and Will was calling the Tea Party "the American Taliban." And there's Reese (who still somehow works for Atlantis after his mom-boss found out that he was hacking people's phones? Also, isn't he on another show? What is he doing here? Run away, Chris Messina!) headed into some important meeting in Washington D.C., only to be stopped by a security guard at the door. His name isn't on the list. Huh. He probably should've checked to make sure he was invited before he came all this way. Reese says he sees people he knows inside because that works. It doesn't. The guard refuses to let him in.

Leona is back, so that's awesome news. Hooray for Jane Fonda! She calls Charlie into her office to blame Will's Tea Party Taliban comment for Reese not getting let into what turned out to be a SOPA hearing. This is very bad, Leona says, because AWM loses lots of money to piracy every year and SOPA could prevent that. "I want the fucking pajama people to stop stealing" AWM's intellectual property, Leona cries. Sorkin!!! Will you ever consider the possibility that there are people who use the internet and wear regular clothes and not muumuus or pajamas? Leona also points out that since AWM owns a bunch of internet delivery systems, AWM could be on the hook for a lot of trouble if SOPA passes. Therefore, she says, she'd like to have something to do with writing the bill that will lose her company money no matter what happens.

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