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Djb: D | Grade It Now!
Children Of The Corny

Max is the King, so he gets to opens the letter with that trademark "I defy the letter opener, paper cuts be damned" non-bravado of his. "Dear Member, Your failure to report as scheduled violates protocol. We must receive word by the 25th of this month or terminate your membership effective that date." The 25th was yesterday! It was the day Whitaker died! Max continues, "Sincerely, T. Greer, Senior Coordinator, Vilandra Project." Music from the Alien Four's native land of the Planet Arium (see what I did there?) forms a somber chord as Isabel flinches at the word but claims she has never heard it before. Liz calls this T. Greer, who asks suspiciously what she wants. She shrugs her shoulders like she's in the middle of enacting a wacky ruse, when in fact all she does is tell the man on the other end the truth: that she just opened the letter, that Whitaker is dead. This T. Greer fellow thanks her for calling and hangs up, and Liz regards the rest of the group and grouses, "He just hung up." Dude, he said thank you. What more did you want? Besides, you'd better keep calls short so that line remains free in case one of your hundred of thousands of callers who...oh, never mind. Seriously, that phone hasn't rung once. Anyway, Max pioneers a plan to drive out to Arizona, and Michael claims that he's not going anywhere until he tracks down Courtney. Max ups the social ante ever so slightly in amassing the most uncomfortable dynamic available, because what are hijinks if they can't be hijinks of the wackiest kind: "We do need you to come with us, Liz. You're the only one who has a legitimate connection to Whitaker." But shouldn't someone stay and take care of the phone, just in case the phone is...oh, that's right. NEVER. MIND.

Liz mans the wheel of the Alienmobile, Tess sleeps on Max's shoulder in the backseat, and Isabel indulges in the in-flight entertainment known to frequent travelers on Casual Viewer Airlines as Grainy Black-and-White Flashbacks Of Whitaker's Grisly Death. "Your name was Vilandra" this and "You had a great love" that. Liz, hands at the ten and two positions and religiously checking the rearview mirror for future episode spoilers (seeing as how the plot progression seems to be taking place completely in reverse), makes eye contact with Max, who wastes no time: "I haven't slept since I saw you with Kyle. Liz, I know you. And I don't believe that you would do that to me. It doesn't make sense. Tell me what happened." And this time, please do it without using any conjugated form of the verb infinitive "to make love." Because you're a seventeen-year-old girl, not Blanche Deveraux after a randy night of Strip Bingo at the Dade County Community Center and a glass of Merlot before getting yourself some "cheesecake on the lanai," if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

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