Episode Report Card
Kim: B+ | 85 USERS: A
Who's The Monster?

Cyrus runs into the house, hoping (or not hoping?) to catch James and Daniel Douglas in the act, but James is alone. Cyrus starts yelling at James for having Daniel Douglas in their house with their daughter sleeping in the next room. Well, she won’t be sleeping for long if you keep bellowing like that, you old horse. Cyrus finally breaks and admits that he knows that James had sex with Daniel Douglas. James says he’s confused because he thought Cyrus wanted him to do it, or was he supposed to refuse Daniel Douglas’s advances. James says he wasn’t sure what kind of "rent boy" he was supposed to play. Cyrus is quivering. James says he doesn’t know what kind of backroom political crap Cyrus is playing, but can’t figure out why Cyrus didn’t just hire a hooker, and he yells this last part, "Why you would PIMP OUT your OWN HUSBAND!" Yes, James! Finally.

Cyrus somehow tries to take the high road, because James cheated. James admits it and says that Cyrus used him like a cheap whore. They start yelling over one another but I did catch James telling Cyrus he’s the devil (true). He then concludes, "You have ruined us! You have ruined everything! Not to mention that you’re a gay man who has gone out of his way to shame another gay man for being in the closet." Yeah, not to mention that. Although, then that brings up how Cyrus can continue to work for a party that would largely rather he weren’t able to be married and be himself. But that’s a whole other ball of wax. James passes Cyrus his laptop so he can see what James has been working on -- it’s a whole page that just says, "I want a divorce." James says he’s taking the baby and leaving.

Just when I think Cyrus is about to have another heart attack, he gathers himself and tells James that he might as well ask for full custody and surely the judge won’t mind the photos. James didn’t know about the photos. Cyrus screams, "You think I would go through with all this, and not get proof?" James thought he knew how low Cyrus would go, but this is a whole sub-basement level. Cyrus’s phone rings but before he answers it, he tells a stunned James, "You’re not going anywhere. You never do." OH DAMN. James, slap him and takes the baby and leave. Cyrus isn’t going to let those photos become public record, and you have so much other shit on him that you can blackmail him into a custody agreement. Let’s start with how he fixed the election and work from there, hmm?

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