Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Demian: C+ | 6 USERS: A+
YOU GRADE IT
The Hardy Boys Have A Furry Fetish

RAAAWWWR! "Eeeeeeeeeeeee!" Raoul! So nice of you to join us. "My pleasure most certainly!" Raoul The Big Gay Supernatural Dragon shrieks from his somewhat dizzy perch atop his overstuffed armchair. "Hey!" Yes? "Was that a slam, missy?!" I'm sure I have no idea what you're-- "You just called me 'somewhat dizzy,' didn't you?" No, I believe I merely impl-- "Semantics!" Raoul shrieks once more, again quite rudely interrupting me. "You called me 'somewhat dizzy,' and I object! I am completely dizzy when it comes to this delightful little bit of televisual entertainment, and don't you forget it!" As you wish, my dizzy friend. As you wish.

The Impala grumbles out of the blackness that follows the new and not-so-improved title card, and as it chews up a length of photogenically damp backwoods nighttime blacktop, we hear Dashing El Deano chewing out his adorable younger brother long before we leap inside the front seat to watch the screamy bitchfest in progress, and make sure you're sitting down for this: Sam apparently informed Dean of The Openly Demonic Hate Blonde's true Hell-sent nature immediately, rather than keeping that knowledge to himself and nursing it as a deeply held and increasingly bitter secret through the better part of the season. Who are these remarkably attractive and truthful gentlemen, and what have they done with the LYING LIARS WHO LIE we've all come to know and mock over the last two seasons? In any event, Dean's furious that Sam did not immediately exorcise The Hate Blonde back into Hell, or whatever, but that's not important, because Darling Sammy just gave the woman a proper name! Hooray! Yep, turns out "Ruby" The Hate Blonde not only might be able to rid El Deano of that pesky Crossroads Demonette problem of his, but also "knows more than [Our Intrepid Heroes] will ever find out" about the current threat they together face. For those reasons -- plus maybe the fact that Sam didn't return from The Great Beyond 100% completely right, as hinted at by his uncommonly argumentative and forceful rejections of Dean's many reservations in this scene -- The Ginormous Revenant allowed Ruby to prance along on her merry way to wherever the hell she was going. "It's the creeping rot!" Raoul excitedly shrieks. "I thought those silly people responsible for this delightful little bit of televisual entertainment had forgotten, but evidently I was wrong, because the creeping zombie rot is affecting the dear boy's brain! Whee!"

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Supernatural

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