Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: C | 8 USERS: D
The Hardy Boys Go Native

They continue to jaw on about being or not being in danger on the front steps until they hear the swarm approaching and realize there isn't time to go inside to get the wife before leaving. I'm surprised they didn't just take off and leave her there. As if any of them cares about that pair of tits. They all rush inside, and engage in a number of completely asinine swarm-prevention activities such as gently tucking a single towel between the front door and the floor. The phone is dead and there's no cell phone reception because of the swarm. Sam suggests that they stuff up all the holes (hee) in the house, the power goes out, and things are starting to get pretty dicey in there. A great shot of Jensen Ackles looking confused. As in, confused about how he found himself in such a shitty episode. The Acks goes wandering into the kitchen and grabs a travel-sized can of bug killer. Seriously, I think this is the twelve-ounce mini-can or something.

When the group hears thumping, they realize that it is the flue in the fireplace, which quickly gives way to a swarm of bees shooting into the house. So, obviously they all head upstairs. To the attic. Instead of keeping a number of wooden barriers -- walls, ceilings, doors, etcetera -- between them and the bugs, they've opted for flimsy plywood and thin tar shingles. Great. And, AND! On their way up the stairs, Dean is using his tiny can of bug spray as a miniature flame thrower. A flame thrower shooting approximately six inches of flame at a swarm that was large and strong enough to bust through an iron flue. The stupidity of this conclusion is giving me epilepsy.

So we all know what happens next. They spend about two minutes in the attic, during which time termites eat through the wood, and fly into the attic but are not followed by any other sort of bug, all while Jensen Ackles uses his tiny flame thrower to pathetically impotent effect, and then it is sunrise and the curse is broken. What? WHAT?

The Metallicar pulls up in front of Larry's house. A tiny moving van is parked outside and Larry tells them that the development "has been put on hold while the government investigates those bones. But I'm going to make damn sure no one ever lives here again." Um, okay, whatever. Larry isn't upset about his "financial disaster" because he was able to bond with his son over it all. Um, okay, whatever. Matt is in the driveway ditching his bug collection and tells Sam that bugs weird him out now. Sam says, "Yeah, I should hope so," and then walks away. Um, okay, WHATEVER.

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