Episode Report Card
Demian: C | 2 USERS: B-
The Hardy Boys Have A Suisse Mocha Moment

Cut to Our Intrepid Heroes ambling down the street and into Metallicar. According to Dean, as they now have reason to believe Angela's a vengeful spirit, there's only one way to make sure she doesn't slash anyone else's throat: "Burn the bones." "Burn the bones?" Sammy freaks. "Are you high?" There's a terribly amusing moment wherein Dean considers how, precisely, to respond to that question. "Angela died last week!" Squeamish Sammy continues to protest. "There's not gonna be bones -- there's gonna be a ripe, rotting...body in the coffin!" Hee. "Since when you afraid to get dirty, huh?" Dean teases, gunning the Impala and rumbling off down the street.

Get this sly transition: As the edge of Metallicar's sloping rear window and trunk pass through the frame, the screen wipes along with it to reveal the cemetery late that night. It's all so very Young Frankenstein. Which, you know, is appropriate, because the camera's landed on Our Dear Boys digging up yet another grave. If they burst into a rousing chorus of "Ah, Sweet Mystery Of Life" the moment their shovels thunk onto the casket, I might have to marry Eric Kripke. Doesn't happen, of course. Sigh. That would have ruled. In any event, the boys finally hit the coffin and grab flashlights as Sam hoists the lid open to reveal...nothing but a white satin pillow. DUN! Well, DUN! except for the fact that we already knew this was going to happen, because the promos promised us zombies. The ominous horns grow loud on the soundtrack as the camera cuts over to...

...the interior of Nerdy Neal's apartment, where the gentleman of the house is currently unbolting the door to his basement. That's not suspicious at all! We follow him down the pitch-black staircase until he turns a corner to find...Zombie Angela! Perched on a cot! Smiling oh, so very coyly at her would-be master before rising to saunter on up to him, decaying-boobs-first! "I missed you," she purrs, and with that, the reanimated corpse hikes its putrefying tongue down Neal's throat. Neal pulls back sharply, then grins lewdly and dives in for some more of that hot zombie action. Raoul's mighty "EEEEEEEEW!" echoes all the way into the METAL TEETH CHOMP!

Back at the cemetery, Our Intrepid Heroes quickly recover from their mutual befuddlement to spy the ripped lining of the empty coffin's lid, along with the strange markings etched into the surface of the wood below. "I've seen these kinds of symbols before," Dean grits.

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