Episode Report Card
Demian: D+ | 5 USERS: B+
The Hardy Boys Go Viral
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Crackle, Crackle THEN! "You know the truth about Sammy?" No, Mr. Ceiling Demon, sir, but we are supposed to find out tonight! Thanks for asking, though! The Ceiling Demon begins tonight's THEN! by repeating his little snide scenelet with Shut Up Daddy from the season premiere before we get knocked around a bit by Darling Sammy's migraine-inducing death visions for a while. After Sam confirms this rather lame psychic ability for the incredulous benefit of Andy from "Simon Said," he then asks of Shut Up Daddy, "The [Ceiling] Demon said he had plans for me -- do you have any idea what he meant by that?" Shut Up Daddy LIES to Darling Sammy, right before spilling the great big secret truth of it all to El Deano, right before dropping dead. So, El Deano embarks upon a season-long bender of shooting monsters in the face with rock salt that we are meant to interpret as a sign of his deep psychic angst, rather than a sign of, you know, DEAN DOING HIS DAMN JOB. Ooops! This little sequence also includes El Deano meatily thwacking Sam and Gordon around a little bit before whaling on the blameless and bruised Impala with a tire iron, so I guess that was the part we were meant to interpret as a sign of his deep psychic angst. My bad! Despite the fact that, you know, Gordon totally deserved it for using poor Sammy as vampire bait. Whatever. "You're tail-spinning, man," Sam cries out in the voice-over as Dean stares out all dead-eyed from the depths of his blood-spattered face, "and you won't let me help you!"

Crackle, Crackle NOW! Dean, in extreme slow-motion, paces from one closed door in a darkened hallway across to another, deliberately sliding the clip from his automatic to tap it once against the barrel before reloading. I'm almost certain that action was entirely unnecessary, so: Gratuitous Gun Porn. Right there. Are you happy? Raoul, The Big Gay Supernatural Dragon, theatrically stifles a yawn with one of his perfectly manicured paws, so I'm guessing his answer is, "Hardly." The camera jumps inside what appears to be a doctor's office, decorated with a poster commissioned by the "River Grove Chamber Of Commerce" that encourages all of us to "Visit Beautiful Crater Lake," and I suppose I should point out right now that Rivergrove, Oregon, is nowhere near Crater Lake and leave it at that, because there are going to be far more important things to scream about much later in the recap.

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