Episode Report Card
Drunken Bee: C+ | 2 USERS: B
The Hardy Boys Get Religion

Back at the hotel, the brothers discuss how Roy doesn't know what his wife is doing, and instead believes in his "healing" powers. Sam shows Dean the little black book of evil that he found, and then starts explaining about the binding spell he found inside, and I cover my ears and start singing "Row, row, row your boat" to myself to drown out the expositional terror. Sam marvels about the "seriously dark stuff" that Sue Ann had to get into to cast the spell, although I'm not convinced that her actions are that unusual, because Pottery Barn's "Black Magic" line of altars and human blood accessories are all the rage among the Unimaginative, Money-To-Burn set. Dean suggests that Sue Ann was probably desperate to keep Roy from dying. They take a moment to sympathize with her plight before plunging into a lesson on Hollywood ethics. Dean asks why she keeps doing the spell when we all already know why she keeps doing the spell and Dean also already knows why she keeps doing the spell but we have to hear again why she keeps doing the spell: to punish "immoral" people. We get it, she's a religious hypocrite. So now Dean can scoff, "God save us from half the people who think they are doing God's work," and I guess now we won't be upset when Sue Ann dies at the end, but why oh why won't they just stop holding my hand through all of it?

The boys decide that they need to break the binding spell. Dean tells Sam about "the Coptic cross" she was wearing in the tent and that "when she dropped it the reaper backed off." Um, how does he know those two actions were related? He wasn't outside when she let go of the cross, and isn't it just as likely that an interruption to whatever mumbo-jumbo she was mumbling would cause the reaper to back off? Anyway, Sam asks if they should destroy the cross or the altar. Dean says both.Back at tent town, where I'm tired of being. The boys pull up in the Metallicar and Dean takes a moment to feel guilty: "You know, if Roy had picked Layla instead of me..." Yeah, yeah, yeah, and if Judd Apatow had picked me out of high school, I'd be Seth Rogen right now. Sam tells him to cram it, and asks him if he's willing to let someone else die to save her. Sam continues, "You can't play God." Ah yes, a lesson Alec Baldwin learns at the hands of the deceptively bumbling cuckold Bill Pullman in Malice.

The brothers wander aimlessly through the parking lot a bit. We've finally arrived at the final "walking around" part of the episode! Dean tells Sam to find Sue Ann as he purposefully calls the two police officers' attention to himself. Dean takes off at a run, and Sam sneaks over to the The Rev's house. Sam spends some more time shuffling around like he's got all the time in the world. Dean runs through the parking lot, and now this I could watch all night. But no, we've got to cut back to Sam standing on the porch, vaguely looking around himself, thinking, "Now where did I put those sunglasses?" He again takes advantage of his supernatural power of HAVING EYES and glances down to see a glow coming through the slanted metal cellar doors. He hops over the porch railing and heads in.

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