Hello, Cruel World

Episode Report Card
Demian: B+ | 3 USERS: A
Did You Know The Hardy Boys Are Utterly Insane?

ANY-way, where the hell was I? Oh, yeah: Leviathan Annie announces that she and her as-yet-unspecified fellows are hungry. "Yes, about that..." Leviathan Edgar begins, the disapproval clear in the tone of his voice. Leviathan Annie turns her head away from him in a fit of pique and pouts, "I'm sorry!" "'Sorry'?" Leviathan Edgar chides. "They ate the swim team!" Hee. "For God's sake," Leviathan Edgar continues, annoyed, "it made the papers." He wants her to get control of the situation, and he wants her to get control of the situation now, thank you very much, because Leviathan Edgar doesn't like bringing "The Boss" bad news. Leviathan Annie suddenly remembers the lesson she learned from those funny little people who live in the television set, and she asks Leviathan Edgar for his help. DUN!

Sioux Falls General, and let the hijinks begin! "Hooray!" Doctor Gaines enters an examination room, where he finds Leviathan Annie waiting for him, and wow. She sure as hell got to South Dakota fast, didn't she? In any event, after a few preliminaries, Leviathan Annie snatches at the good doctor's wrist, clearly snapping a few of the bones as she does so, and as Doctor Gaines drops to his knees before her, gasping in agony, the camera discreetly circles behind a convenient curtain to capture the next few moments in budget-friendly silhouette. Leviathan Annie's shadow slowly morphs up into Doctor Gaines form, and by the time the camera's passed to the curtain's other side, Leviathan Annie's transformation is complete. The good doctor's doppelganger bares its teeth and lunges, and before you know it, the convenient curtain's been doused with yet another bursting spurt of bright-red arterial spray. "EEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Stockville High. Dean arrives at the locker room just in time to watch as a local forensics expert digs bits of brain matter out of the wall. "GOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!" Dean tippy-toes through the blood-streaked mayhem out in the locker room proper until he finally reaches the showers, where he finds a stark smear of bitterly black demonic foulness marring the tiles. "Dammit!" Dean grunts.

Sioux Falls General. Sheriff Jody opens her whacked-out eyes in the middle of the night to find her doctor bent over her struggling roommate, whose struggles cease once the doc knocks her out with an anesthetic inhalant. Sheriff Jody wisely feigns sleep as the doc wheels the now-unconscious roommate out into the hall, but the minute they're gone, she's pushing herself up out of bed to investigate. Somewhat comically trailing her IV stand behind her, she edges out into the...

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