Holy Terror

Episode Report Card
Tippi Blevins: C | 166 USERS: A-
Hardy Boy, Your Angels Came Home to Roost

By now, Castiel has related his story to Muriel, but she's not sure whether or not she should believe him. "I should still turn you in," she says. "But you won't," he says. "I think you instinctively trust me." He says neither of them wants any part of the fanatics. She wonders why he felt safe praying when he could have attracted one of those very fanatics. He says he was hoping he would sound like some randomly desperate human -- which is kind of what he is now -- and that they wouldn't care about him. He asks her about the war brewing between Bartholomew and the other, unknown-to-him angel. She tells him the new rival is Malachi. Castiel, recognizing the name, calls him an anarchist. Funny thing about a lot of people who claim to be anarchists: they don't oppose hierarchical rule as long as they're at the top of the hierarchy. Muriel says Malachi is worse than Bartholomew in some ways. Angels are being forced to pick sides. Those who, like her, want to stay out of it, are being captured and tortured. Right on cue, Malachi's thugs kick down the door and bring them to...

... some places that looks like they re-purposed that lame Hell set, from when Sam rescued Bobby's soul. Screams echo from behind closed doors that line a dimly lit hallway. Castiel has already been chained to the ceiling by his wrists, partially deprived of his shirt and beaten about the face and neck. Muriel sits slumped against a pillar, badly bruised and clinging to consciousness. "This is a bonus, Castiel," says Malachi and his dorky haircut. "We were tracking Muriel -- cowardly holdout that she is -- and, wonder of wonders, she led us to you." "Not knowingly," clarifies Muriel. Castiel maintains that he doesn't know how Metatron's spell worked. "I was an unwitting accomplice," he says. To go with his silly hairstyle, Malachi also has a bushy goatee that looks like a particularly luxuriant merkin. How was his first act not to get his vessel some better grooming? Anyway, Malachi doesn't care if Castiel didn't know how the spell worked. He still thinks Castiel knows Metatron's weakness. He turns to his minion and says, "Theo." Theo is a big, lumbering brute of a guy, with a thick scar across his face. He grabs a handful of Castiel's pretty, pretty hair and jerks back his head. He drags the tip of his angel blade down Castiel's bare chest. For once, the show didn't cheap out on the effect, and shows a realistic gouge in his flesh in the wake of the blade. Usually they just show a line of red that obviously came from the weapon being dipped in fake blood before the shot. Which is to say: ew.

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