Supernatural
I’m No Angel

Episode Report Card
Tippi Blevins: B- | 112 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
The Hardy Boys and the Case of the Handsome Hobo

The front door splinters inward as Dean kicks his way through. "Cass!" Castiel's relief is short-lived, because April stabs him right beneath the sternum. Dean reaches into his jacket for his own angel blade, but April flings him across the room with a swipe of her hand. Reapers can do that? Then how the hell did Maurice not defend himself? Sam, having just seen his brother so easily dispatched, decides he's going to jump April, and gets flung across the room, as well. April advances slowly – verrrry slowly – on Sam, and punches him in the face, even though she could just beat him up with her magical powers. But then Dean wouldn't be able to pluck the blade from Castiel's gut and skewer her with it while she was momentarily distracted. With April out of the way, Dean rushes back over to Castiel and takes his face in his hands. "Cass! Cass!" He gets no response. "Sam, he's gone." It's not Sam who hears him, but Ezekiel, who kneels down at Castiel's side and brushes his hand over the wounded flesh. As the gashes heal, Samekiel staggers back from the effort and slumps to the floor.

"Dean?" calls a familiar, gravelly voice. Castiel, just coming to, looks around in confusion. Dean, at first disbelieving, then relieved, growls at him, "Never do that again!" Castiel looks up at him, more confused than ever. "All right...?" Dean, who you'd think would be a better liar after all these years of pretending to be everything from cops to priests, has to scramble for a way to explain everything. He says he made a deal with April to heal Castiel while Sam was unconscious, then reneged on the deal and killed her. "You lied," Castiel sums up, impressed. "I do that," Dean admits. Comical music plays, even though it's not a very comical situation. We don't even get a "you're back from the dead!" hug.

Back at the LOL, Sam is still wondering how Dean even knew where to find Castiel. Dean lies about finding the info in Maurice's pockets, which Sam doesn't remember happening. Further questioning is interrupted when Castiel wanders into the hub. "I am really enjoying it here," he sighs. "Plentiful food, good water pressure... Things I never even considered before! There really is a lot to being human, isn't there?" He looks so happy and so clean. "It isn't all burritos and strippers," Dean says, chowing down on one of those burritos as he speaks. Castiel thinks about everything he's learned in the last few days about survival, but has come to realize being human is more than that. "You look for purpose, and you must not be defeated by anger or despair, or by hedonism, for that matter." Dean's like, "Where does hedonism come into it?" Castiel, grinning slyly, says, "My time with April was very educational." Sam thinks for some reason that Castiel is talking about dying, which, you know, isn't terribly hedonistic unless you smothered to death on chocolate-covered cabana boys. Castiel has to explain about the S-E-X thing, which makes Dean choke a little bit. "Did you have protection?" he asks once he's no longer in danger of suffocating on burrito. "I had my angel blade," Castiel says. He's looking forward to learning more from the Winchesters. Lesson 1: Toothpaste goes on the toothbrush. Lesson 2: Condoms go on the wang.

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Supernatural

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