Mannequin 3: The Reckoning

Episode Report Card
Demian: C- | 2 USERS: C
The Hardy Boys Experience Acute Renal Failure

That evening, Dean wheels the rain-streaked Impala into an abandoned parking lot somewhere remote and disembarks to greet Sam, who's brought Mousy Isabel along for the processing summit that follows. "That the girl with the haunted kidney?" Dean asks, peering at her through the windshield of Sam's rental before marveling, "Just when you think you've seen it all." "Whaddya wanna do?" he asks, understanding that they "can't exactly burn the thing, 'cause she kinda needs it." "Well," Sam points out, "she can't just walk around with it." "The spirit's attached," he reminds us all, "and it's gonna use her to get close to anyone it wants revenge on." So, you know, he's implying that the ghost of Rose Brown won't be satisfied just slaughtering her final tormenters, but instead will likely go after everyone who ever slighted her at any point during her life. Interesting little conundrum they're facing here, isn't it? Shame about the sucky way they end up resolving it.

As they mull over their options -- which include black-market replacement kidneys and hoodoo -- Mousy Isabel emerges from the rental to wonder what gives, and it's at this point that Ghastly Rose makes the leap into Metallicar, assuming control of the Impala much like Constance Welch did way back during the pilot. Ghastly Rose guns the engine and takes off after Dean, who leads it in circles around the lot for a very long while until he somehow manages to get it to smash through the plate-glass window of a defunct gas station. Our Intrepid Heroes, of course, emerge from the entire ludicrous experience unscathed, but alas! A large, jagged shard of glass has magically embedded itself in Mousy Isabel's abdomen, and she promptly keels over, dead. How convenient. Ghastly Rose makes a brief appearance to apologize to everyone for being such a lousy Monster Of The Week, and then she self-immolates, leaving the boys alone to gasp and pant their respective ways into this evening's final CHOMP!-less commercial break.

Bobby's Emporium. Despite the damage to their car, Sam and Dean have nevertheless managed to drive it back to the lush coastal rainforests of southeastern South Dakota, where we find Dean working on the engine as Sam approaches with a couple of beers. "What exactly did we do back there?" Dean frowns, uncapping his brewski. "Yeah, I'm not putting it in the Win column, either," Sam sighs. "We saved a few dicks," Dean grouses, "and we killed an innocent girl?" Yes, Dean. Yes, exactly, and it sucks to be you, I'm sure, but could you please wrap this up? Dean goes on to whine about that failed relationship of his I stopped caring about midway through the season premiere, but Sam encourages him to look on the bright side: Satan, after all, has at long last left the building, and Darling Sammy's got his soul back. "I never thanked you for that, did I?" he asks. "It's all good," Dean assures him, but Sam expresses his gratitude, anyway, and vows that he'll always have Dean's back. "I know," Dean nods, allowing himself to smile for the first time since we arrived in South Dakota and, after the camera leaps up into the air to offer us one final shot of them from above, we finally cut to black.

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