Episode Report Card
Demian: A | 11 USERS: A+
The Cracky Boys Crack The Crack Crackman Of The Crackopacrack

Back in the back, Castiel Latinates for a bit with arm outstretched, and then Our Intrepid Trio waits. And waits. And waits. And waits and waits and waits and waits and waits and waits and waits until a rather large, especially jovial, and entirely naked Cupid magically materializes right behind Dashing El Deano to hoist Our Dear And Decidedly Disgusted Boy straight up into a bone-crushing bearhug that just as quickly vanishes into this evening's first METAL TEETH CHOMP! Wah-wah-waaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Bar Back. Immediate Aftermath. Dean's feet dangle helplessly in the air for a while until The Cupid finally makes note of Castiel's magnificently brooding presence, and he immediately drops Dean to the floor to wrap My Sweetly Disgruntled Baboo up in a bone-crushing bearhug of his very own. The Cupid next lunges to attack Darling Sammy as Dean panics, "Is this a fight? Areweinafight?" "This is their...handshake," Castiel delicately corrects as the overexuberant Cupid latches onto Darling Sammy despite the latter's best evasive maneuvering. "I don't like it!" Dean shouts. "No one likes it," Castiel quietly admits. Heh. Meanwhile, The Cupid's over in the corner with Sam, all, "Just what I always wanted -- my very own Ginormotron! I will name him George, and I will hug him and pet him and squeeze him and pat him and pet him and rub him and caress him and I will stroke his freakish Cro-Magnon forehead and rub his pretty flyaway hair and... wait a minute! Why'd you make me materialize?" Castiel accuses The Cupid of murdering those he was meant to help, with said accusation immediately reducing the excessively emotive Cupid into a blubbering, shuddering mass of tears, and long story short, this whole Cupid thing's nothing more than a red herring. Well, little more than a red herring, for after the whole misunderstanding's been cleared up thanks to one of Castiel's Vulcan mind-melds, The Cupid exposits that "Heaven" mostly keeps its hands out of human affairs, but does intervene when "certain bloodlines" must be kept going and "certain destinies" need to be ensured. Like, oh, I don't know...Burnt Mary and Sucky John's, f'rinstance! The boys, of course, are shocked and appalled to learn this, especially when The Cupid reveals that Burnt Mary and Sucky John despised each other before their hearts got felt up by an angel, and Dean reacts as one does in such situations by slugging The Cupid in the face. Or, you know, attempting to, because Dimwit El Deano still hasn't learned that punching an angel in the face results in little more than a spiderweb of hairline fractures spreading out across one's own knuckles, but that doesn't matter right now because The Cupid's finally taken offense at all of this screaming and violence, and has quite sensibly disappeared, presumably never to be seen again. Next!

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