Supernatural

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Drunken Bee: B | 1 USERS: A+
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The Hardy Boys Get the Night Sweats

Sam bangs on the closet doors, and we cut to the upstairs bedroom, where Dean is patting a rag on Serial Mom's head wound. Why is that how head wounds are always dealt with on television? Pat, pat, pat. The door opens in front of Max, who enters and then makes the door slam behind him. He then mind-throws Dean high into the air and slams him against the wall, where he makes quite an indentation on the plaster. As Dean struggles back to his feet, ManBoy pulls the gun on Serial Mom and then withdraws his hand, leaving the gun there floating unconvincingly. What is the big appeal of killing someone with a floating weapon? The gun then takes a little float down a river of air, stopping right in front of Serial Mom and cocking itself. Puhlease. Dean puts himself between the gun and Serial Mom and tells Max that if he wants to kill the lady he'll have "go through me first." Shot of floating gun in foreground with Max behind it. He simply says, "Okay." Shot of floating gun trigger being pulled, then shot of Dean with red bullet hole mark in the center of his head with blood splattering the walls behind him. Geez, this is a bloody episode! And just in case we missed it, a pan down the bloody walls to Dean's dead, open-eyed face. Bright lights of "Just Kidding, Folks!" transition us back to Sam in the closet, who screams in mind-pain over the image of his dead brother. Sam yells, "No! NOOOOOOO!!" and the china cabinet slides away from the door. Back to Sam inside the closet, looking confused and lost. ["…!" -- Sars] He taps on the door, which now opens easily. Cut back upstairs, where we're at the part of the "vision" where Dean steps in between the gun and the mom. This time, when Max says "Okay" right before pulling the trigger on Dean, Sam busts through the door, still looking really cutely confused by his new powers. Sam stops Max and tells him they can help. The gun floats shakily in front of Max, and when Sam suggests that none of this is "going to fix anything," he succeeds in giving Max another bright idea. ManBoy pauses and then says, "You're right," just before quickly turning the gun on himself and blowing his own head away. Serial Mom has got a real dumb gaping mouth, and then we got to commercials with a shot of Sam's "Back to Psychic School" face of shock and disappointment.

In the living room, a police officer interviews Serial Mom, who reveals herself to be a masterful liar. She tells him Sam and Dean are old family friends she called for help and that she doesn't know where Max got the gun. The policeman puts his notebook down, and she sobs, "I lost everyone." Eh, who cares, lady. Sam and Dean leave the house while Sam beats himself up over his terrible handling of the situation. Dean tells him to stop, that nothing could have helped Max, but I beg to disagree. They both totally fucked up -- Dean bringing the gun in, Sam deciding to take the exact wrong moment to start his Differently-Abled Child Survivors of Mommy Ceiling-Kabob Support Group. Dean thinks Max was "too far gone" and suggests that the only thing that would've have helped is if they had gotten there "twenty years earlier." Sam sighs and then tries to open up membership in his club to Dean: "I'll tell you one thing, we're lucky we had Dad." Dean is moved, and very pretty (his eyelashes are coated in L'Oreal Lash Extender and his lips yet again Bonne-Belled): "I never thought I'd hear you say that." Sam explains further, "Well, could have gone a whole other way after Mom. A little more tequila, a little less demon-hunting." Hmmm, What Would You Rather? I'm voting margarita. Dean sniffs in approval. Sam wanks, "We turned out okay, thanks to him."

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Supernatural

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