Episode Report Card
Demian: A | 7 USERS: A
The Hardy Boys Are So Screwed

Cut to the interior of a most amazingly decorated room Our Intrepid Heroes have rented for the length of their stay in lovely downtown Milwaukee. It's Schlitz-themed. Well, "Schultz-themed" because they didn't want to pay for the rights to the real beer's logo, but whatever. The lettering and the artwork is nearly identical, so we'll give them credit, especially because of that large screen of oversized beer bottles interspersed with the company's logo that separates the living area from the kitchenette. Oh, and the big cow on the wall, too. In any event, turns out Sam confiscated Fat Ronald's copies of the security tapes, which is what that whole "first things first" bit was about. Dean both admires Sam's moxie, or whatever, and pities poor Fat Ronald -- who did, after all, come very close to solving this particular mystery on his own. "'Mandroids'?" Sam sneers again. "Okay, except for the mandroids part," Dean allows as he traces the downtown sewer routes off an old blueprint. Meanwhile, Sam argues that in Fat Ronald's case, ignorance is bliss. "If he were to go up against this thing," Sammy points out, "he'd get torn apart. Better to stay in the dark and stay alive." "I guess," Dean shrugs, still clearly sympathizing with the fat guy. The boys then drop the matter to remind us all of the shape-shifters' "retinal reaction to video" and their apparent fondness for sewer living, just as Dean transfers his tracing to a map of local businesses. "There's one more bank lined up on that sewer main," he realizes. I'd offer a DUN!, but I believe we knew that already, right, Raoul? Um, Raoul? "Shhhhh!" Raoul hisses, momentarily pausing all of the click-click-clacking of his knitting needles that had been underscoring the episode for me up to this point. "I'm trying to get the Chief Of Staff's eyeball to bulge out the way it did on the show, and it requires all of my concentration! Leave me alone until they get to the gore!" You're knitting a bulging eyeball into that thing? "Only the best for my husband Jack Bauer!"

Wow, Raoul scares me sometimes. Anyway, sure enough, the one bank left standing is The City Bank Of Milwaukee. We cut over to find the place buzzing with activity as that aging security guard from the top of the hour leads Our Intrepid Heroes through the main lobby. The boys are masquerading as technicians from "SecuriServe Guard Service," and my, but don't they look scrumptious in their navy blue coveralls? Long story short, they talk their way back to the hidden bank of security cameras by LYING that there's "a glitch in the overall grid," and soon enough, the aging guard is leaving them alone with a cheery, "Okey-dokey!" After the door shuts behind them, Dean gets this goofball grin on his face and announces, "I like him. He says 'okey-dokey.'" Snicker. We then get a lengthy -- lengthy -- montage of the boys futzing with the cameras, clearing Mr. Okey-Dokey of suspicion first before Dean abuses his temporary position to zoom in on the heart-shaped derriere of one of the tellers. Ahem. One of the female tellers. I should know by now to specify things like that when addressing you people, shouldn't I? "Dean, we're supposed to be looking for eyes," prissy Sam grumps. "I'm getting there," Dean's leeringly appraising ducky lips pucker. Just as that female teller exits the frame, the bank's manager enters it to flash a couple of glowing white eyes at the camera. "Got him!" Sam breathes, immediately jumping up to head to the door. Dean's about to follow when he spots something far more troubling on one of the other screens: Fat Ronald dumping a rifle at his feet as he frantically lashes the bank's front doors shut with a length of chain. "Hello, Ronald!" Dean sarcastically remarks as the shot pans in on Ronald's screen for a moment before...

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19Next





Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP