Supernatural

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Demian: A- | 7 USERS: A+
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The Hardy Boys Go Where Angels Fear to Tread

Long story short, Castiel's superiors have begun questioning his sympathies due to the uncommonly close relationship that's been developing between the angel and Dean -- and all of the judgment-impairing emotions attendant upon such a relationship -- so Uriel's been given command over this particular mission, which is why Dean needs to shut it and twist off Alastair's nads already. "You ask me to open that door and walk through it," Dean warns by way of response, referring of course to both physical and metaphorical doors, here, "you will not like what walks back out." "For what it's worth," Castiel offers, "I would give anything not to have you do this," and guys? You two really need to knock it off and pick out china patterns already. Unfortunately, they pay me no heed, for the next thing we know, Dean's trudging through That Door with a rolling dolly cart absolutely packed with various old-school implements of demonic destruction, and oh, shit. Now I have to listen to Fake Brando talk for the next half an hour. By the way, shortly after this episode aired, I received an urgent message from the lovely and talented Couch Baron that read, "Was it me, or did Alastair this evening switch from his shitty Brando impression to a shitty impression of Paul Lynde doing a shitty Brando impression?" I believe dear Baron Von C. came to that absolutely correct conclusion the instant Fake Brando opened his mouth this evening, for the first things we hear from the guy are the lyrics to "Cheek To Cheek," which he begins crooning in Dean's general direction the moment Dean's crossed That Door's threshold. Shut up, asshole. Uncle Arthur, of course, does not listen to me, and the slithery sneering and speechifying goes on and on and on and on and ON, so let's jump ahead to the bit wherein we learn that Uncle Arthur actually tortured Daddy Shut Up during the latter's extended stay in Hell, shall we? "By all means!" Thanks, my scaly friend, because that means we've skipped the entire scene! Next! "Ooops! Hee!"

Yep, barely has Dean had a chance to react to this devastating and entirely unexpected news when the camera hops on over to this week's motel room, where Princess Embolism's just arrived to sulk and mope and pout about angel stench, or some such nonsense, and now she can shut the hell up, too, and what's the point of this scene, again? Oh, yeah: Princess Embolism has a magical way to discover Dean's current whereabouts, and it's actually pretty cool. Unfortunately, we'll have to wait to see it, because we must first endure Darling Sammy expressing his concerns that Dean's not up to the current task the angels have assigned him. Dean came back from Hell wrong, you see, and so it's up to Sam to extract the necessary information from Uncle Arthur himself. Princess Embolism scoffs, for she knows Sam's not strong enough to take on Alastair. "I will be," Sam vows, his eyes all a-shadowed, and DUN!

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Supernatural

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