Episode Report Card
Demian: C | 2 USERS: A+
The Hardy Boys Check In To The Overlook Hotel

Upstairs, the door to Room 237's ajar, with the key still in the lock. Dean arrives and wastes not a moment retrieving the key before plunging into the room with the bad news. "I know," Sam croaks from his blurry slouch in one of the room's chairs in the background of the frame. "I saw." "What'd you find out about Granny?" Dean demands, futzing around with something in his backpack. From behind him comes a woozily complaining, "You're bossy!" Dean freezes, then whips his head around at the somewhat bedraggled Sammy, who's just now coming into focus on the screen. Sam elaborately flops his arms out in some sort of "Um, duuuuuh!" half-shrug and repeats, "You're bossy!" He thinks as best he can for a moment before giggling to add, "And short!" Hee! If Sam next mocks Dean's clompy bow-legged stomp of angry determination, my work here is done. Alas, it is not to be. "Are you drunk?" Dean eyebrows. "Yeah!" Sam challenges. "So?" As Dean spins around to note the fifteen empty mini booze bottles scattered across the top of the room's courtesy refrigerator, drunken Sam slings a pouty "Stupid!" at Dean's back. Heh. And then what had been a somewhat amusing scene up to this point goes all to hell as Drunken Sammy starts wallowing in The Angst That Will Kill The Recapper to blather on and on and on about the dead closer and the missing Ava and Destiny! and If I Don't Save Everyone, You'll Have To Kill Me Like Daddy Shut Up Said! and snooooore. "Yeah, well Dad's an ass!" Dean snaps back in response to Sam's last bit of moaning. "He never should have said anything! I mean, you don't do that -- you don't lay that kind of crap on your kids!" "See what I said about the shout-outs becoming more satisfying as the episode progresses?" Raoul inquires. Yes, Raoul. Yes, I do. However, The Angst is goose-stepping all over whatever fun I should be having at this moment, so let's get this over with, shall we? Sam's drunk and shouty, so Dean slams "Sasquatch" onto the latter's bed with orders to get some damn sleep already, and Sam gets all clingy and gross the way the overly inebriated all too frequently do, and then Sam finally passes out on his stomach. Dean frets as Raoul and I theatrically stifle a pair of yawns.

Unable to sleep because he finally agreed to kill Sam just to get him to shut the hell up or whatever, Dean ambles down the main staircase to angle through the main floor, eventually arriving in the manor's grand dining room with its illuminated-from-below bar, and bravo to the production design staff for so nicely evoking the Gold Room scene in The Shining. What follows between Dean and old Sherwin -- here acting as the inn's barkeep -- bears absolutely no resemblance at all to events in the movie, of course, but it is, visually speaking, a nice little homage. In any event, Dean and Sherwin gossip about the recent spate of unnatural deaths over a couple of glasses of whiskey for a bit until they gather up their cocktails so Sherwin might lead Dean on an impromptu tour of The Pierpont and its many, many secrets. Out on the stairwell, Sherwin indicates a photograph of young Grandma Rose and a preadolescent Miss Susan in happier days, and we get the entire history of the place in a few brief sentences. In short (snerk), the inn is actually the family's ancestral estate, and now Rose is to be shipped off to an assisted living facility so the real estate developers can rip down the old place to toss up McMansions, or something. Dean makes appropriate sympathetic noises as they shift their attention to another set of framed portraits on a nearby table. One of them features Rose as a girl, posing with her Creole nanny, Marie. Nanny Marie's apron features a prominent five-spot on the bodice. DUzzzzzzzzz! Sherwin places the picture more prominently on the nearby mantle as Dean silently nods his head around, all, "Well, that's interesting." "It's really not, my dear boy," Raoul sighs, "but I suppose we'll go along with your assessment of the situation for now."

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