Shut Up, Dr. Phil

Episode Report Card
Demian: D+ | 7 USERS: B+
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Of course, this means Dapper Sam's actually excused himself to go galumphing up Stately Stark Manor's main stairs to snoop around the master bedroom, but why quibble? Sam wanders into the Starks' tremendous walk-in closet, where he finds Mrs. Stark's side of things swept clean of all her belongings save for a pair of broken heels, a silver pentagram necklace, and a shoebox full of witch-related crap. DUN!

Meanwhile, down in the study, James Marsters is still talking, and I'm still not caring about his existence on the planet, and then Dapper Sam returns to get all J'Accuse! on everybody's ass. More or less. He starts peppering Mr. Stark with questions regarding the latter's estranged wife, "Margaret" -- portrayed, of course, by this evening's other very special guest star -- and long story short, Maggie walked out on him after she learned of the affair he'd been conducting with one of his business partners. Unfortunately, said business partner was not Dewey Stevens, because that would have added some tiny spark of interest to the tedious and pedestrian tale of marital woe we're currently enduring. No, Mr. Stark was actually banging the real estate agent and, after Dapper Sam helpfully encourages Mr. Stark to make nice with the wife, no matter the cost, he drags Dapper Dean out to...

...Stately Stark Manor's front porch, where he fills Dean in on all of the witch-related crap he found upstairs in the closet. They quickly deduce that Mr. Stark's sinned-against missus is of the haggish persuasion, and there follows an entirely unnecessary reference to this atrocity until Eagle-Eyed Sammy once again spots large patches of dead vegetation, this time surrounding the very porch they're standing on. "You know," Sam observes, eyeing the rotting ornamentals, "if she's strong enough, just being pissed off is enough to send some pretty bad vibes their way." "Literally kill off everything around her," Dean surmises, "just by PMS-ing at it? That's not creepy at all." He gets on the horn to Bobby, demanding the hairball concoct some sort of hag-eradicating potion for them, and then the two climb into the Impala to motor on over to...

...Maggie's temporary digs. The lady of the house is not at home at the moment, so Dean breaks in to have a look around while Sam rather damply stands guard outside in the rain. Dean pokes his head into various near-empty rooms until he finally stumbles across a full hex altar set up in one of the upstairs closets. Sigil-smeared photographs of Maggie's first three victims surround an as-yet-unmarred enlargement of Perky Jennie's employee ID, and Dean mutters something about keeping it in your pants as the camera cuts back...

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