Episode Report Card
Demian: C- | 22 USERS: A-
It's Better For the Hardy Boys to Burn Out Than Fade Away

So, now that The Virgin Chuck's disappeared and everyone's assumed he went to Heaven, we head back to Bendy Lisa's for a quiet little coda involving scotch and mashed potatoes. Mmmm. Scotch and mashed potatoes. Meanwhile, out by the sidewalk, a streetlamp buzzes and blinks and flickers on and off until it finally zots out. DUN! As thunder rumbles overhead, the camera pans down to take in a fifteen-foot-tall portent of doom now lurking in the shadows, staring at the cozy little scene of supposed domesticity unfolding behind Bendy Lisa's picture window, and at the last instant, the angle reverses to push us all into Darling Sammy's face. Or is it? Dun-dun-DUN!

Holy crap, am I glad that's over with. "Flagon?!" But of course, friend of friends, and have you anything to add at this juncture? "I do not! Do you!?" Well, I must admit this episode made me feel the teensiest bit nostalgic for the long-ago days when this show was shiny and new, and it was all about pretty boys with guns shooting monsters in the face with rock salt. "And?!" Well, you know: And chick-flick moments were verboten, and you could take your touchy-feely self-help yoga crap and cram it up your stupid ass. Bitch. "And now!?" God, why are you asking me so many questions? I just want to have a cocktail! "Answer, please!" And now I just want to end this recap and enjoy my booze -- happy summer hiatus, everyone! "Kisses! Delirious summer hiatus kisses to all of my pretties!"

Demian still thinks you should get out more. Raoul still agrees. "It's summer, my lovelies! Revel! Revel in the sunshine!" You may reach the former at The latter is an imaginary gay dragon no longer under house arrest on the Internet. "I'll see you at the beach! Whee!"

See what made the cut in this list of TV's 50 most shocking moments ever.

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