Supernatural

Episode Report Card
Demian: C- | 22 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
It's Better For the Hardy Boys to Burn Out Than Fade Away

And, Chuck tells us, after Sal Moriarity dropped dead in a bar from a massive coronary the Impala ended up at "Rainbow Motors," a used car lot in Lawrence, Kansas, where an ex-Marine "bought her on impulse" "after a little advice from a friend." Here we're treated to a few silent moments of Pre-Sucky John and Time-Traveling El Deano interacting with each other years and years ago before we head back to the present, where Chuck's finishing the prologue to the Supernatural book series' "Swan Song" like so: "I guess that's where this story begins. And here's where it ends." I think a tiny little chill ran up and down my spine at that. You know, in the good way. Too bad the episode itself didn't live up to the promise of this opening sequence. "Demian!" Ooops! Spoiler!

And after that elegiac introduction to this evening's festivities, the shot cross-fades to Bobby's Emporium deep within the lush coastal rainforests of southeastern South Dakota, where we find Darling Sammy chilling out on the Impala's hood with a beer. Eventually, Dashing El Deano ambles on over from his episode-ending chat with the gentleman of the Emporium and, after snagging a brewski for himself from the cooler at Metallicar's side, Dean agrees to Sam's abysmally stupid plan for ending The Apocalypse. "You're gonna let me say yes?" Sam eyebrows, shocked. "No," Dean replies, explaining, "That's the thing -- it's not on me to let you do anything. You're a grown -- an over-grown -- man, and if this is what you want, I'll back your play." And now Dean's just as stupid as everybody else on this hateful show. Next!

SPLAT! Well, that was awkwardly timed, wasn't it? Also: Raoul? "...!" What, are we pouting? "...!" Oh, knock it off with the silent treatment, friend of friends. What gives? "Well, I am sorry I'm sure!" Raoul shrieks, even though I've a feeling he's not terribly sorry in the least. "But how can I get excited about this season's endlessly compelling blood-burst of a title card when I know it's the last time I'll be seeing it?! [Wail!] Oh, woe! WOE!" You poor thing. "[Sniffle!]" Are you sure you can't find it in you to writhe about with delight just one last time, anyway? "I...! I...! [Sob!]" Please? "Well! If you insist!" Oh, I do. "Eeeeeeeeeeeee!" Well, that wasn't quite up to your usual standards of frenzied glee, but don't you feel even the tiniest bit better? "I do, actually!" Then, how about you really throw yourself into it this time? "Okay! EEEEEEEEEEEEE!" And once again, all is well with the world. "EEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Excellent.

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Supernatural

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